A Bee's-Eye View from the Clouds

United We Scroll: 100 Things We All Secretly Agree On That Democrats Actually Campaign On While Republicans Pretend Don’t Exist

Every morning, cable news assures us that America is a house divided, a republic hanging by a thread, two tribes locked in a forever war where a neighbor’s yard sign is the moral equivalent of Pearl Harbor. Turn on Fox News and you’ll learn Democrats are Satan’s personal interns. Flip over to MSNBC and Republicans are cosplaying Franco with worse hair.

And yet—here’s the plot twist polling keeps screaming in neon letters—Americans actually agree on a shocking amount of stuff. Like, a lot.

And here’s the second twist: Democrats are the ones actually putting those things into bills, budgets, and campaigns. The GOP? They’re mostly busy banning library books, holding hearings about gas stoves, and pretending that if they scream “Hunter Biden” loudly enough, insulin prices will go down.

We’re constantly told we’re teetering on the edge of Civil War 2: Electric Boogaloo, but polling shows broad, bipartisan majorities nodding along to the same solutions—the very solutions Democrats are already trying to legislate while Republicans vote “nay” and then run home to cut a ribbon at the federally funded project they opposed.

So let’s do the unthinkable: let’s list one hundred things Americans across the spectrum actually support. And let’s note, with biting precision, that Democrats are running on them while Republicans cling to their donor calls.

Guns: The Unspoken Consensus (That Democrats Put Into Bills Republicans Kill)

  1. Universal background checks. Democrats write the bill. Republicans kill it in committee.
  2. Closing gun-show and online loopholes. Dems: “Sure.” GOP: “What if the Founding Fathers wanted Craigslist Glocks?”
  3. “Red flag” laws. Dems say, “Yes.” Republicans say, “Only if the flag is rainbow.”
  4. Disarming domestic abusers. Dems: “Absolutely.” GOP: “But what about his Second Amendment feelings?”
  5. Safe storage laws. Democrats file legislation. Republicans call it tyranny.

Social Security and Medicare: Don’t Touch Our Stuff (Unless You’re Paul Ryan with a PowerPoint)

  1. Protect Social Security. Democrats pledge it. Republicans whisper “privatize.”
  2. Protect Medicare. Democrats fund it. Republicans plot “sunset clauses.”
  3. Medicare drug negotiations. Dems passed it. GOP sued to stop it.
  4. Lowering drug costs. Democrats legislate. Republicans hold pharma fundraisers.
  5. $35 insulin caps. Democrats capped it. Republicans voted “no” and still took credit back home.

Healthcare Transparency: Democrats Say Yes, Republicans Pretend Surprise Bills Build Character

  1. Junk fee crackdowns. Dems push laws. GOP calls it “government overreach.”
  2. Upfront health prices. Dems want it. GOP says, “Let hospitals bill like Vegas casinos.”
  3. Mental-health expansion. Dems propose funding. GOP cuts it to buy more border wall.
  4. Addiction treatment. Democrats fund. Republicans lecture about “personal responsibility.”
  5. Naloxone access. Dems support. Republicans: “But have you considered bootstraps?”

Veterans: Democrats Write Bills, Republicans Vote Against Them Then Brag at the VFW

  1. Strengthen VA healthcare. Dems pass the PACT Act. GOP votes no, then shows up at the ribbon-cutting.
  2. PTSD/brain injury research. Democrats: yes. GOP: “But CRT in schools!”
  3. Fair troop pay and housing. Dems write budget lines. GOP cuts them to fund tax breaks.
  4. Clearing VA backlogs. Dems: “Fund staff.” GOP: “Thoughts and prayers.”
  5. Not abandoning vets after tweeting “thank you.” Only one party actually tries.

Infrastructure: Democrats Pass It, Republicans Campaign Against It Then Pose With Shovels

  1. Roads, bridges, rail. Dems passed the Bipartisan Infrastructure Law. Republicans voted no, then claimed credit.
  2. Lead pipe replacement. Democrats: “Yes.” GOP: “No, unless bottled water lobby approves.”
  3. Rural broadband. Democrats fund it. Republicans take credit while railing against “big government.”
  4. Rail safety. Democrats demand stronger rules. GOP says, “Regulation bad, derailments character-building.”
  5. Airline fee transparency. Democrats propose laws. GOP blocks them for the airline lobby.

Tech Annoyances: Democrats Draft Consumer Protections, GOP Pretends Spam Calls Are Free Speech

  1. Robocall crackdowns. Dems fund enforcement. GOP underfunds the FCC.
  2. Protecting kids online. Democrats push safety bills. GOP derails them with “drag queen hearings.”
  3. Data privacy. Democrats legislate. GOP whispers “corporate donors need this data.”
  4. Consent for tracking. Democrats: yes. GOP: “If Meta’s happy, we’re happy.”
  5. AI deepfake labels. Democrats push it. Republicans say, “But Hunter’s laptop memes are content!”

Cyber & Supply Chains: Democrats Push “Buy American,” GOP Just Wants Tax Cuts

  1. Cybersecurity. Democrats fund it. GOP cuts it.
  2. Domestic manufacturing. Democrats invest billions. GOP votes no, then tours the factory.
  3. Buy American. Democrats codify it. GOP screams “protectionism” until they’re in front of cameras.
  4. Apprenticeships. Democrats expand. GOP says, “But what about gender pronouns in schools?”
  5. Small business support. Democrats pass grants. GOP calls it socialism until their cousin needs one.

Housing & Childcare: Democrats Try, Republicans Call It Marxism

  1. More housing. Democrats: yes. GOP: “Not in my district.”
  2. ADUs. Dems support zoning reform. GOP clutches pearls about HOAs.
  3. Transit-oriented zoning. Democrats propose. Republicans scream “war on cars.”
  4. Homelessness prevention. Democrats fund programs. GOP says, “Just arrest them.”
  5. Lower childcare costs. Democrats write bills. Republicans filibuster.

Families and Kids: Democrats Offer Policies, GOP Offers “Family Values” Hashtags

  1. Paid family leave. Democrats propose. GOP: “Un-American.”
  2. Child Tax Credit. Democrats expanded it, cut child poverty. Republicans let it expire.
  3. Pre-existing condition protections. Democrats protect. GOP sues to gut ACA.
  4. Affordable school meals. Democrats pass expansions. GOP votes against feeding kids.
  5. Financial literacy. Democrats add it to schools. GOP bans books about race.

Education: Democrats Invest, Republicans Ban

  1. More civics education. Democrats: yes. Republicans: “Unless it mentions slavery.”
  2. Career/technical education. Democrats fund. GOP says, “But CRT!”
  3. Clearer college pricing. Democrats push rules. GOP says, “Market will fix itself.”
  4. Affordable community college. Democrats propose. Republicans kill it.
  5. Career pathways in high school. Democrats expand. Republicans whine about pronouns.

Reproductive Health: Democrats Protect, GOP Attacks

  1. Abortion in rape/incest. Democrats: yes. GOP bans.
  2. Contraception access. Democrats: yes. Republicans block.
  3. IVF protection. Democrats propose. GOP votes no, then tells constituents “we care about families.”

Civil Rights: Democrats Say Yes, Republicans Dog-Whistle

  1. Same-sex marriage. Democrats codified it. Republicans voted against it.
  2. Equal pay. Democrats push enforcement. GOP filibusters.
  3. Non-discrimination. Democrats legislate. Republicans cry “woke.”
  4. Disability access. Democrats fund services. GOP cuts.
  5. Maternal mortality reduction. Democrats: yes. GOP: “What if Planned Parenthood benefits?”

Public Health: Democrats Fund, Republicans Grandstand

  1. Cancer screening. Democrats expand. GOP defunds NIH.
  2. Pandemic preparedness. Democrats: yes. GOP: “COVID was fake.”
  3. Vaccination coverage. Democrats support. GOP undermines with Facebook memes.
  4. Counterfeit pill crackdowns. Democrats legislate. Republicans scream about border caravans.
  5. DUI enforcement. Democrats fund NHTSA. GOP says, “What about beer freedom?”

Everyday Safety: Democrats Push, GOP Shrugs

  1. Texting bans. Democrats legislate. GOP says, “Nanny state.”
  2. Seat belts. Democrats: yes. GOP: “Freedom to fly through windshield.”
  3. School security. Democrats fund counselors. GOP funds AR-15s for teachers.
  4. Counselors in schools. Democrats: yes. GOP says, “What if they’re gay?”
  5. Elder abuse detection. Democrats propose. GOP yawns.

Government Waste & Ethics: Democrats File Bills, Republicans Trade Stocks

  1. Social Security fraud protection. Democrats: yes. GOP: “But my donor’s consulting firm!”
  2. Reducing waste. Democrats strengthen oversight. GOP weakens watchdogs.
  3. Transparency. Democrats push rules. Republicans gut them.
  4. Ban stock trading. Democrats file bills. GOP kills them.
  5. Financial disclosures. Democrats: yes. GOP: “Privacy for politicians only.”

Institutional Trust: Democrats Push Reform, GOP Pretends Chaos = Patriotism

  1. Term limits for Congress. Democrats propose. Republicans drag their feet.
  2. SCOTUS ethics. Democrats file bills. GOP says, “Court is holy.”
  3. Paper ballot backups. Democrats legislate. GOP pushes voter fraud conspiracies.
  4. Make voting easy. Democrats pass expansions. GOP restricts.
  5. Early voting. Democrats: yes. GOP: “Sunday souls to polls is scary.”

Elections: Democrats Want Fairness, Republicans Want Power

  1. Free voter IDs. Democrats: yes. GOP restricts.
  2. Nonpartisan redistricting. Democrats propose. GOP gerrymanders.
  3. Stronger foreign interference penalties. Democrats file. GOP blocks.
  4. Political ad transparency. Democrats: yes. GOP: “But dark money loves us.”
  5. USPS reliability. Democrats fund. GOP tries privatization.

Environment: Democrats Act, Republicans Drill

  1. Protect parks. Democrats fund. GOP leases them.
  2. Clean air/water. Democrats enforce. GOP deregulates.
  3. Planting trees. Democrats: yes. GOP: “What if it’s woke forestry?”
  4. Disaster relief. Democrats fund. Republicans vote no, then demand checks.
  5. Energy efficiency. Democrats legislate. GOP says, “Green tyranny.”

National Security: Democrats Fund, Republicans Fundraise

  1. Balanced energy. Democrats: yes. GOP: “Drill baby drill.”
  2. Domestic medicine. Democrats invest. GOP votes no.
  3. Screen foreign ownership. Democrats: yes. GOP shrugs until China buys farmland.
  4. NATO support. Democrats: yes. GOP: “Trump said nah.”
  5. Fair housing for troops. Democrats legislate. GOP blocks.

Criminal Justice: Democrats Push Decency, Republicans Push Culture Wars

  1. Body cams. Democrats: yes. GOP: “War on police.”
  2. De-escalation training. Democrats fund. GOP cuts.
  3. Rape kit backlogs. Democrats fund. GOP slashes.
  4. Child exploitation penalties. Democrats strengthen. GOP looks away.
  5. Care worker checks. Democrats legislate. GOP ignores.

Healthcare Odds & Ends: Democrats Again, GOP Again

  1. Transparency in hospital networks. Democrats: yes. GOP: “Ghost networks are jobs.”
  2. Affordable generics. Democrats legislate. GOP opposes.

Satirical Reflection: United in Agreement, Divided by Republicans

So there you have it: 100 things Americans broadly, overwhelmingly, almost boringly agree on—and 100 things Democrats actually run on, legislate, or vote for, while Republicans block, spin, or quietly co-opt after the fact.

The truth? We agree on so much that the only people invested in our division are the ones selling it back to us: pundits, consultants, lobbyists, and—let’s be blunt—the Republican Party, which thrives on cultural panic while Democrats push the boring, popular policies that make life easier.

Imagine the horror: Fox News without a chyron screaming “Democrats want to steal your gas stove,” just a segment on how 80% of Americans support the exact bill Democrats filed. Imagine CNN forced to admit that the biggest obstacle to consensus is not the public but the politicians whose donors hate consensus.

Of course, that would require political courage from the GOP—a resource rarer than bipartisan agreement itself. So instead, we’ll continue the kabuki theater of division, while Democrats keep introducing bills that reflect what Americans already want, and Republicans keep blocking them, then bragging about the ribbon-cuttings.