The morning light filtering through my window feels impossibly grim today, November 6th, 2024. The air itself seems heavy, thick with a palpable sense of disbelief and profound dread. The results are in, and the reality is a gut punch: Donald Trump has won the presidency. My heart is an open wound, aching with a fear so visceral, so pervasive, that it’s almost paralyzing. I am truly, utterly, shocked.
This isn’t just about a political outcome; it’s about the very soul of our nation, the future of our rights, and the safety of countless marginalized lives—including my own. For weeks, for months, I clung to hope, believing that sanity, decency, and progress would prevail. And I believed, deeply, unequivocally, that Kamala Harris would win. I still believe she deserved it more than anyone. Her vision, her resilience, her unwavering commitment to justice—these were the very qualities I thought America would choose. This outcome feels like a profound betrayal of that hope, a personal and collective devastation.
The Crushing Weight of Defeat: A Future Veiled in Fear
The shock of this loss is immense. I had invested so much hope, so much belief, in a different path forward. To witness the triumph of rhetoric rooted in division, grievance, and authoritarian tendencies feels like a fundamental rejection of the inclusive, equitable future I believe in and actively fight for.
- The Personal Reckoning: As a gay man, biracial, a cancer survivor, and a liberal Democrat, Trump’s victory immediately conjures a terrifying landscape. His past rhetoric, his actions, and the policies he champions directly threaten my identity, my community, and my very peace of mind. The “thoughts and prayers” he offers are hollow echoes in the face of the actual harm his policies inflict. This isn’t theoretical; it’s a direct threat to my fundamental rights and safety. My own history, marked by being outed, family abandonment, and prejudice, makes this fear acutely personal.
- The Betrayal of Progress: Every step forward in LGBTQ+ rights, in reproductive freedom, in racial justice, feels incredibly precarious. The work done to create a more inclusive society, to build bridges, to heal divides—it feels like it’s all hanging by a thread, vulnerable to being unraveled by executive order, judicial appointments, and legislative onslaughts.
- The Silence of the Majority: Part of the shock is wondering how so many could vote for this. How could enough people choose a path that embraces division, that demonizes the vulnerable, that disregards established norms? It leaves me grappling with a profound sense of bewilderment and isolation, a chilling reminder of the disconnect within our own society.
Kamala Harris: A Champion Underserved
My love for Kamala Harris runs deep, and her loss feels particularly devastating. I’ve followed her career, admired her trajectory from prosecutor to Attorney General, to Senator, and then to Vice President. She is a woman of immense intellect, unparalleled resilience, and a profound commitment to justice.
- A Consistent Voice for the Marginalized: Harris has been an unwavering champion for LGBTQ+ rights, for reproductive freedom, for voting rights, and for addressing systemic inequalities. Her record is clear, her advocacy consistent. She has fought tirelessly for the very principles I believe in, often facing immense misogyny and racism in her own journey.
- A Vision of Inclusive Leadership: She offered a vision of leadership that was inclusive, empathetic, and forward-looking. She spoke to the promise of America, not its grievances. She sought to unite, not divide.
- The Weight of Expectation: As the first female Vice President, and a Black and South Asian woman, she carried the immense weight of expectation for so many. She represented breaking barriers, forging new paths, and embodying the evolving face of America. To see her effort, her brilliance, and her dedication not culminate in the ultimate victory feels like a profound injustice, a personal heartbreak for me and for countless others who saw themselves reflected in her. She deserved it—her hard work, her intelligence, her unwavering spirit.
The Specter of What’s to Come: A Terrifying Landscape
The fear I feel is not simply of Trump himself, but of the pervasive, destructive influence he brings, and the individuals he will inevitably elevate.
- The Undermining of Institutions: His past presidency demonstrated a clear willingness to challenge and undermine democratic institutions—the judiciary, the press, the electoral process, the civil service. This erosion of democratic norms poses a fundamental threat to the very framework of our republic.
- The Resurgence of Bigotry: His rhetoric consistently emboldens extremism, racism, homophobia, and xenophobia. We’ve witnessed a rise in hate crimes and divisive rhetoric under his influence. His return to power risks unleashing these destructive forces with renewed vigor, creating a more hostile and dangerous environment for marginalized communities.
- The Project 2025 Blueprint: The alarming detail of Project 2025, which I’ve previously dissected, outlines a comprehensive, regressive agenda designed to dismantle civil service, strip away reproductive rights, target LGBTQ+ protections, and consolidate executive power. This is not mere speculation; it is a clear, written plan for the future, and it is terrifying in its scope and implications.
- A Cabinet of Loyalists: The fear is that his next administration will be staffed not by independent thinkers or experts, but by loyalists dedicated to implementing his agenda without question. This threatens to further dismantle checks and balances and consolidate power in unprecedented ways.
The Path Forward: Resilience in the Face of Despair
Today, the fear is palpable. The shock is raw. The disappointment is immense. But even in this profound moment of despair, I refuse to be paralyzed. My own life, marked by trauma and unexpected turns, has taught me that resilience is not a choice; it is a necessity.
- Grieve, Then Organize: It’s okay to feel the pain, the shock, the profound disappointment. But then, we must channel that grief into action. We must regroup, organize, and prepare for the battles ahead.
- Protect Our Communities: The most vital task now is to protect the most vulnerable, to strengthen our chosen families and communities, and to provide support for those who will bear the brunt of these policies.
- Stay Vigilant and Engaged: We cannot afford to disengage or succumb to apathy. We must remain informed, continue to speak truth to power, and hold those in power accountable for their actions.
- Fight for Our Rights (Locally and Beyond): The fight for rights shifts to every level—local, state, and federal. We must continue to vote with purpose, to advocate tirelessly, and to resist every attempt to roll back progress.
This is a profoundly difficult day. The sky feels heavy, and the future appears veiled in uncertainty. But my commitment to justice, to equality, and to a more compassionate world remains unwavering. We face a terrifying landscape, but we face it together, armed with resilience, solidarity, and an unyielding determination to fight for the future we believe in.