Latest posts
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Elon Musk Declares War on Knowledge, Armed Only with Ego and a Lobotomized AI
Just when you thought Elon Musk couldn’t get any more chaotic, he opens his intergalactic mouth and says—no, tweets—that Grok 3.5 (or 4, or whatever number he’s feeling that day) will “rewrite the entire corpus of human knowledge.” Not update it. Not improve it. Rewrite it. With “advanced reasoning,” which in Muskland apparently means Reddit-level
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The Top 10 Places No One Should Visit, Ever (Sorry, But Not Really)
Some cities are called hidden gems. Others should stay hidden like cursed relics sealed away for humanity’s protection. And yet, against all reason, people still book flights, plan road trips, and willingly subject themselves to places that radiate the energy of expired milk and sadness. Whether it’s toxic humidity, questionable locals, political decay, or the
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Sergio Gor: The HR Spy Who Ghosted Elon Musk
At first glance, Sergio Gor doesn’t scream “international spy.” He screams “owns multiple vests” or maybe “asks if the coffee is ethically sourced.” But according to Elon Musk, the man quietly running the Presidential Personnel Office might be more than just an ambitious bureaucrat—he could be a sleeper agent planted by Russia to undermine America’s
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What TV Taught Me That Religion Never Could
I spent the first chunk of my life being told that truth lived between two leather-bound covers: The Holy Bible. I was taught that everything worth knowing—morality, love, justice, salvation—had already been figured out, footnoted, and translated into King James English. Questioning it wasn’t curiosity; it was rebellion. And rebellion got you exactly one ticket
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Trump Might Start World War III, But Imagine the Horror of Kamala Harris and Her Free Healthcare Agenda
So, Donald Trump is back in the Oval Office, tan lines deepening, hair defying physics, and nuclear codes resting comfortably next to his Diet Coke button. The man is currently eyeballing Iran like it’s a golf course he can bulldoze, muttering things like “We’re gonna do something big, folks. Huge. Maybe even explosive.” And while
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The Unofficial Rules of the Gym (According to Someone Who Doesn’t Go)
I want to be clear up front: I do not frequent the gym. I don’t even infrequent the gym. If the gym were a person, we’d be the kind of estranged acquaintances who wave awkwardly across a crowded room and then both pretend to take a phone call. I have nothing against exercise—I just prefer
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5G Mind Control and Lizard People: The Most Ridiculous Conspiracy Theories I’ve Ever Heard (and Maybe Believed for 0.2 Seconds)
You ever hear something so absolutely batshit that your brain short-circuits trying to process it? Like, your eyebrows do that confused slant, your jaw unlatches, and you momentarily disassociate while wondering if we, as a species, deserve to survive? Yeah—welcome to the glittery underbelly of conspiracy culture. Now listen, I’m no stranger to questioning authority.
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Sometimes I Don’t Want to Be the Bigger Person — I Want Revenge and Popcorn (Extra Butter, Extra Petty)
There’s a very specific kind of rage that bubbles up when someone wrongs you and somehow walks away wearing a halo, smiling like they just donated a kidney to a koala. It’s the kind of righteous fury that makes you want to dye your dog neon pink, roll up to their house with a boombox
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Too Many Holidays, Says the Man Who Took Off MLK Day to Golf
Why Trump’s Juneteenth Tantrum Says the Quiet Part Out Loud It was Juneteenth — a day set aside to commemorate the emancipation of enslaved Black Americans — when Donald J. Trump, never one to miss an opportunity to be tone-deaf in high definition, decided to grumble about there being “too many holidays.” I’ll pause so
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A World Holds Its Breath: Trump’s Perilous Iran Countdown
A clock ticks, not on a wall, but in the collective consciousness of a world holding its breath. It’s a temporal countdown, set by a single declaration, that hangs heavy over the Middle East and ripples outward to every corner of the globe. In a political landscape often defined by pronouncements and posturing, some statements