Latest posts
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The Great Gatsby 2: Trump’s Halloween Feast While America Starves
Every generation gets the Gatsby it deserves. In the 1920s, it was Jay. In 2025, it’s Donald. One spent his fortune chasing a dream across the bay. The other rented out an entire country and called it Mar-a-Lago. This week’s masquerade ball at the Winter White House wasn’t just a Halloween party—it was performance art.
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When the Substitute Teacher Runs the School: Obama’s Return and the Democrats’ Echo Problem
There are few sights as surreal as watching a former president outshine his successors while trying not to. Barack Obama, ten years out of office, has become the most effective voice in the Democratic Party again, not because nostalgia sells, but because competence apparently does. His reemergence on the campaign trail for down-ballot Democrats feels
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The Spreadsheet Is a Crime Scene: JPMorgan, Epstein, and the Fine Art of Looking Away
The modern banking system has a curious definition of morality. If you or I move a suspicious thousand dollars, the government freezes our account, our credit dies, and an algorithm red-flags us into financial purgatory. But if you’re Jeffrey Epstein, you can move a billion dollars through the world’s largest bank for sixteen years and
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How to Nuke a Rule: Trump, the Filibuster, and the Illusion of Process
When Donald Trump takes to Truth Social to explain constitutional procedure, it’s like watching a raccoon perform heart surgery. The confidence is unmatched, the tools are wrong, and yet somehow half the country insists he’s reinventing medicine. This week, Trump posted what might be his most nakedly authoritarian policy demand to date: “Republicans must use
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Trump Passed His Dementia Test and Is Thankful He Studied
Some presidents measure success by legislation passed, crises avoided, or wars prevented. Ours measures it by whether he can remember five random words in the right order. This week, President Donald Trump announced—again—that he “aced” his dementia test, a boast that feels less like an assurance of cognitive health and more like a cry for
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The Ballots Are Coming From Inside the Mailbox: Trump’s Latest Election-Rigging Hallucination Hits the Road
Donald Trump has logged on again, which means logic has logged off. His latest Truth Social rant claims that the 2020 election was “Rigged and Stolen,” that mail-in voting should be banned, and that California’s Prop 50 redistricting referendum will have “Millions” of fake ballots “shipped” in. He offered no proof, no evidence, no math—just
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Eat the Rich, Not the Ramen: America’s Favorite Pastime of Blaming Hungry People on SNAP for Being Poor
America has a long, proud tradition of punching down. We could have been the country that invented bullet trains or universal childcare, but instead we perfected the art of yelling “Get a job!” at someone carrying a bag of store-brand cereal and a SNAP card. Forty-two million people are on the Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program,
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The Recall Economy: How Deregulation Turns Your Pantry, Medicine Cabinet, and Nursery Into a Roulette Wheel
There’s a joke that isn’t funny anymore: if you want to understand American politics, skip the speeches and read the recall notices. The speeches are for theater; the recalls are for people who eat food, put drops in their eyes, buckle a baby into a lounger, or charge a phone without wondering if the battery
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Trump’s Meme Administration: When the Government’s Group Chat Took Over the Country
Somewhere between the press briefing room and a Fortnite lobby, the machinery of American governance appears to have been replaced by a collection of preteens armed with official seals, a ring light, and an unhealthy relationship with social media validation. The official feeds of the White House, DOJ, Pentagon, and assorted Cabinet offices now read
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Trump’s The Apprentice: Kremlin Edition
It took three years, two wars, and one canceled summit for America’s Strongman-in-Chief to finally pretend to stand up to his idol—and even now, it looks more like performance art than policy. The White House has slapped sanctions on Rosneft and Lukoil, Russia’s two biggest oil arteries and the bankroll of Vladimir Putin’s imperial cosplay.