Latest posts

  • The Supreme Court Greenlights Guesswork Policing (or How to Arrest Someone for Existing in Spanish)

    The Supreme Court Greenlights Guesswork Policing (or How to Arrest Someone for Existing in Spanish)

    The U.S. Supreme Court once again demonstrated its uncanny ability to treat the Bill of Rights like IKEA instructions: skimmed, misread, and discarded in the recycling bin because who has time for nuance when there are “emergency dockets” to clear. In a 6–3 order, the Court stayed a Los Angeles federal judge’s restraining order that

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  • Trump vs. Newsom and the Battle for America’s Caps Lock Key

    Trump vs. Newsom and the Battle for America’s Caps Lock Key

    The Washington Post unveiled what can only be described as America’s summer-long pay-per-view event: the cage match between President Donald Trump and California Governor Gavin Newsom. Forget inflation. Forget foreign policy. Forget climate collapse. The real fight for America’s soul is happening on X, the platform formerly known as Twitter, now better known as a

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  • When the Sky Itself Becomes a Weapon

    When the Sky Itself Becomes a Weapon

    Overnight into September 7, 2025, Russia treated Ukraine not to diplomacy, not to dialogue, but to the largest aerial assault of the war. Eight hundred drones and decoys. A dozen-odd missiles. A Cabinet of Ministers building in Kyiv set ablaze like a grotesque fireworks finale. Ukraine says it intercepted the vast majority. But when the

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  • The Cult of the Supporter and Why I Don’t Give a Damn About Trump

    The Cult of the Supporter and Why I Don’t Give a Damn About Trump

    Let me say it again for the people in the cheap seats: I don’t give a damn about Donald Trump. Not a single molecule of my being is interested in his daily diet of McNuggets, the awkward orange glow of his tanning bed addiction, or the bizarre way he insists on pronouncing “China” like he’s

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  • The Million-Dollar Letter: Austin’s “A” and the Art of Public Branding

    The Million-Dollar Letter: Austin’s “A” and the Art of Public Branding

    On September 4–5, 2025, Austin unveiled its first-ever unified city logo: a wavy blue-green “A” allegedly inspired by the hills, rivers, bridges, and violet-crown skies that define the Texas capital. It is, in the words of the city, a “strategic modernization.” In the words of the internet, it’s “Dallas-adjacent,” “corporate clipart,” and “the most expensive

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  • The Antichrist With a Red Tie

    The Antichrist With a Red Tie

    I am not religious. I have never mistaken a casserole for communion or believed that a televangelist’s sweaty forehead could save me. But if you flip through the Book of Revelation—an acid-trip fever dream of beasts, trumpets, and plagues—it feels like a spoiler alert for American cable news. Specifically, it reads like a casting call

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  • Trump vs. Harvard: When Federal Grants Become Campaign Props

    Trump vs. Harvard: When Federal Grants Become Campaign Props

    On September 3, 2025, U.S. District Judge Allison D. Burroughs did something rare in modern America: she called bullshit in a ruling and put the federal government back in its constitutional corner. Her decision ordered the Trump administration to unfreeze nearly $2.2 billion in research grants to Harvard, a freeze that was less about academic

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  • From Chicago to the Crescent City: Trump’s Traveling Law-and-Order Roadshow

    From Chicago to the Crescent City: Trump’s Traveling Law-and-Order Roadshow

    On September 3, 2025, President Trump announced that New Orleans—yes, the city of brass bands, beignets, and waterlines nobody can forget—was next on his federal “law-and-order” tour. Fresh off threatening Chicago with “National Guard domination” and still basking in the glow of his unprecedented takeover of Washington, D.C.’s police force, Trump pivoted south, declaring that

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  • When the Music Stops: America’s Job Market Plays Musical Chairs with No Extra Chairs

    When the Music Stops: America’s Job Market Plays Musical Chairs with No Extra Chairs

    On September 3, 2025, the Bureau of Labor Statistics did something rare: it delivered a plot twist. The newest JOLTS report showed that job openings slipped to 7.181 million in July, falling below the roughly 7.2 million unemployed Americans for the first time since April 2021. Translation: there are now more people looking for chairs

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  • Cash Me Outside the Constitution: How the Presidency Became Trump’s Most Profitable Side Hustle

    The polite version says markets respond to policy. The honest version says markets respond to who writes the policy—and whether he’s already holding the bag you’re about to fill. On September 1–2, 2025, the Trump family’s crypto venture World Liberty Financial flicked its neon “OPEN” sign, listing the $WLFI token across major exchanges and conjuring

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