Latest posts
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Olivia Nuzzi’s American Canto: The Art of Selling a Scandal Without Actually Selling the Goods
When the memoir is less a reckoning and more a press release written in the font of a nervous breakdown. The collapse of a reputation in Washington usually follows a predictable physics. There is the initial transgression, followed by the frantic denial, the inevitable leak of digital receipts, the forced resignation, and finally the exile
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The Real Housewives of the House Republican Conference: A Play in Three Acts of Self-Destruction
If you want to understand the current state of the Republican Party, do not look at their policy papers. Do not listen to their speeches about fiscal discipline or the sanctity of the border. Instead, imagine a community theater production of Julius Caesar directed by a substitute teacher who has lost control of the classroom,
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Cabinet Meeting of the Living Dead: A Seventy-Two Hour Autopsy
When the President invents eighteen trillion dollars and then falls asleep, you know it’s Tuesday. The federal government has always been, at its core, a theater of the absurd, but the last seventy-two hours have transcended mere farce and entered the realm of avant-garde performance art. We just witnessed a Cabinet meeting that functioned less
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The Federal Bureau of Influencers: Inside the 115-Page Suicide Note of American Intelligence
The G-men have left the building, and the content creators have moved in. The most terrifying documents in American history are rarely the ones stamped top secret or buried in a bunker in Virginia. They are the ones that are leaked in a panic, the bureaucratic distress flares fired by people who have realized that
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The Theater of the Double Tap: When “Kill Everybody” Becomes Policy
Marketing the abyss, one authorized tragedy at a time. The water in the Caribbean is specifically blue, the kind of blue that sells rum and resort packages, but on September 2 it was merely the backdrop for a much older, darker commerce. Somewhere in that expanse, a boat stopped moving, disabled by the kind of
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The Pardon of King Bibi: How to Turn a Criminal Trial into a Coronation
The architecture of a modern democracy is usually designed with a few load-bearing walls intended to prevent the whole structure from collapsing into a authoritarian heap. One of those walls is the novel concept that the person running the country is subject to the same penal code as the person sweeping the floor. But in
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The No-Fly Zone of the Id: How Trump Annexed Venezuela in 280 Characters or Less
The airspace above a sovereign nation is usually governed by a complex web of treaties, international conventions, and the boring, reliable physics of radar and air traffic control. But in the year 2025, the laws of aerodynamics and the Chicago Convention on International Civil Aviation have been superseded by a more potent force: the Caps
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The Dictator from the Dollar Store: Why Our Trump Authoritarian Nightmare Feels Like It Was Ordered on Temu
We are living through a moment where the phrase “ethnic cleansing” is being rebranded as a lifestyle choice by the Department of Homeland Security, but because this is America in 2025, the branding feels less like a terrifying historical echo and more like a drop-shipped product that arrived three weeks late in a crushed box.
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Gratitude in the Blast Zone: A Love Letter to Matthew, Chemo, Chihuahuas, and the Art of Not Dying in Texas
We are told to be thankful for the big things: health, family, the roof over our heads. But this year, in the twilight of 2025, I find myself offering a quiet, fervent prayer to Beyonce and Lady Gaga of gratitude for something far more specific, something that doesn’t fit neatly on a Hallmark card. I
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Trump Wants His 1998 Back: Why ‘Rush Hour 4’ Is Now a Matter of National Security
We often tell ourselves that power is about nuclear codes, interest rates, and the invisible hand that moves aircraft carriers across the chessboard of the Pacific. But in the twilight of the American empire, power is apparently the ability to force a major Hollywood studio to greenlight a buddy cop sequel that nobody asked for