Latest posts
-
The Man of Steal: White House Declares Trump Superman in Latest Tweet
In a move that confirms we are living in the world’s most expensive community theater production, the White House has officially tweeted a photo of Donald Trump dressed as Superman—yes, that Superman—with the caption:“THE SYMBOL OF HOPE. TRUTH. JUSTICE. THE AMERICAN WAY. SUPERMAN TRUMP.” Somewhere in a Kansas cornfield, Clark Kent just facepalmed so hard
-
Weather Warnings Were Budget Cuts in Disguise
In a shocking twist that surprises absolutely no one who’s been awake for the last year, the same administration that promised to “streamline government” has now successfully streamlined people right into floodwaters. That’s right: the Department of Government Efficiency (DOGE)—Trump’s golden retriever of a bureaucracy—slashed funding to NOAA and the National Weather Service (NWS), and
-
Julian McMahon Has Died—and With Him, a Whole Era of Sexy, Supernatural Danger
Julian McMahon has passed away, and honestly? I’m not doing well. If you’re of a certain queer, witchy, or chaos-loving persuasion, you know exactly why this hits harder than it probably should. Because this wasn’t just any actor—this was Cole Turner. This was Dr. Christian Troy. This was the man who somehow made being morally
-
Happy 4th of July! The Country’s Already on Fire—Might as Well Add Fireworks
Ah, Independence Day. That one time of year when we gather ‘round gas grills, wave flags made in China, and celebrate “freedom” by launching flaming projectiles into the nearest drought-stricken field. Because nothing screams liberty like sparklers in one hand and existential dread in the other. We’re told it’s a patriotic tradition. But let’s call
-
Why I’m Self-Publishing: When the Doors Don’t Open, Build Your Own
Not the Plan, But the Point” I believe LGBTQ+ stories deserve to exist on the page—not as punchlines, sidekicks, or cautionary tales—but as full, complex lives with agency, nuance, and joy. We are firefighters. Nurses. Teachers. Cops. Parents. Grocery store managers. Everyday people. And the more we tell our stories—ourselves, for ourselves—the harder it becomes
-
SpaceX and the City: Elon’s Galactic Baby Mamas
Welcome to “SpaceX & the City,” the only show where the launchpad is your loins and the paternity test is pending. Today’s episode? A whirlwind romp through the Musk-iverse—a place where kids are named after Wi-Fi passwords and co-parenting involves occasional Twitter likes. Let’s meet the brave women who made the bold decision to bear
-
Update: Year 2025. Still No Jesus. Still Stuck with Your Asshole Followers.
Hey Jesus, Just circling back (again). Still no sign of you. No heavenly descent, no clouds parting, no divine trumpet blast—just the usual right-wing podcast hosts calling everything the Antichrist and Marjorie Taylor Greene misquoting you while selling tactical Bibles on QVC. Listen, I know it’s been a long 2,000 years. You’re probably busy blessing
-
Shaken, Not Spanked — Amazon’s James Bond Wishlist Proves MI6 Now Accepts Interns
Amazon, the same company that turned free shipping into a moral compass and made Jeff Bezos bald with power, has unveiled its wishlist for the next James Bond. The contenders? Jacob Elordi (Euphoria), Tom Holland (Spider-Man), and Harris Dickinson (Triangle of Sadness). Which is fitting, because this casting list feels like a triangle of cinematic
-
The New York Time’s Top 100 Movies of the 21st Century — A Love Letter to Films You Pretended to Understand
Top 30 films you’re supposed to pretend you’ve watched twice Gather around, cine-snobs and weekend warriors alike. The New York Times has once again handed us their curated list of the “100 Best Movies of the 21st Century,” as ranked by 500 industry insiders. In a world where joy equates to a cat video getting
-
The Friendship Recession: America’s Loneliest Bull Market
We Have 17 Streaming Subscriptions and Zero Emergency Contacts Remember when people used to have best friends? Like, actual humans they saw in person, not just blurry profile pics you “like” once a month out of guilt? Well, welcome to the Friendship Recession—the only economic downturn that won’t get a bailout because it doesn’t impact