Latest posts
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America’s Food Safety Is So Broken That Even the Experts Eat Like They’re Disarming a Bomb
When your dinner order starts to sound like a legal deposition, something has gone very wrong There is a moment, somewhere between opening a menu and making eye contact with the waiter, when modern Americans are expected to perform confidence. We scan descriptions of leafy greens and artisanal toppings, nod thoughtfully at words like fresh
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The Game Awards 2025 and the Night One Game Ate the Stage
Eight trophies, one gravitational center, and an industry that briefly convinced itself this was destiny rather than appetite. The Game Awards 2025 unfolded like a formal ceremony that accidentally wandered into a single studio’s victory party and then politely decided not to leave. Clair Obscur: Expedition 33 did not simply win big. It became the
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ISIS “Comes Back” Again and Trump Administration Pretends It’s a Plot Twist
Three Americans dead near Palmyra, serious retaliation promised, and the same old lie that a victory lap is the same as an ending. An ISIS-linked ambush near Palmyra in central Syria hit a joint U.S. and Syrian partner movement and killed two U.S. service members and an American civilian interpreter. Three additional U.S. troops were
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Karoline Leavitt Turns the Briefing Room Into a Fact-Free Escape Room
The press asks for information, the podium offers vibes, and the real product is confusion with a patriotic label. There are two ways to look at a White House press briefing. The old way is as a daily information exchange, flawed but functional, where reporters ask questions and the government, at least in theory, answers
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Kristi Noem Shows Up to Oversight With a Script and Leaves With More Questions
The administration calls it law enforcement, critics call it a rights grinder, and Congress tries to remember it has a job besides yelling. The House Homeland Security Committee hauled DHS Secretary Kristi Noem in for an oversight hearing and the whole thing played out like a courtroom drama performed by people who hate courts. Noem
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Snowflake Is Melting Down: Trump Labels His Hurt Feelings Treasonous
The Founding Fathers Forgot to Mention That Napping is Now a State Secret Donald Trump has finally invented a new branch of jurisprudence called “feelings treason,” where noticing a seventy-nine-year-old man is tired is punishable by the full force of the internet. It was only a matter of time before Donald Trump, a man who
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Gavin Newsom Wants Democrats to Be Normal, Even If It Means You Have to Disappear
The Governor of California has discovered the secret to winning 2028, and it involves throwing the most vulnerable people in his coalition into a closet labeled “Later.” There is a specific kind of political epiphany that only happens in rooms where the bottled water costs twelve dollars and the audience is composed entirely of people
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The Remake is Always Worse: Why the War on Venezuela is Just the Iraq Script with an Orange Trump Filter
We have seen this movie before, and spoiler alert: the ending involves a lot of sand, a lot of blood, and absolutely zero refunds. The American military machine has always had a flair for the cinematic, but the recent seizure of the oil tanker Skipper off the coast of Venezuela felt less like a naval
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The Repo Man Wears a MAGA Hat: Trump Administration Decides That the Only Thing Trickling Down is Interest
The government has decided that the biggest threat to the American economy is a twenty-six-year-old with a degree in graphic design and an extra two hundred dollars a month. There is a specific kind of silence that falls over a generation when they realize the safety net was actually a trap door. For the last
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The Battle of the Billionaire Kaiju: Netflix and Paramount Fight to See Who Gets to Kill Cinema
The ink wasn’t even dry on the surrender treaty before a new warlord arrived with a bigger bag of cash and a scarier line of credit. Just when we thought the funeral for the Hollywood studio system was over, just when we had resigned ourselves to a future where Warner Bros. was merely a sub-directory