Latest posts
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The Ministry of MAGA Purity: Laura Loomer’s White House Talent Show
The scariest part? This isn’t satire. The talent show’s already happening; it’s just dressed in bureaucratic language and the American flag. The audience — us — is left to decide whether we’re watching political theater or the prelude to something much darker. Because purges don’t stop when the list is done. They stop when there’s…
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BREAKING: Trump Takes Over DC Police in “Law & Order” Miracle — Deploys National Guard for Public Theater
WASHINGTON —History books have a habit of glossing over the quieter coups. The ones without tanks rolling through the streets, without generals at microphones, without gunfire. The coups that happen under the cover of “public safety,” with a smile, a signature, and a TV camera. This week, Donald Trump proved that you can drape a
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The Art of the Strategic Amnesia: Trump’s Epstein Damage Control Summit
Washington has seen its share of “nothing to see here” moments, but this week’s gathering in the West Wing might be the new gold standard. Picture it: Vice President J.D. Vance, former Florida Attorney General Pam Bondi, and loyalist-turned-FBI-director Kash Patel huddled together under the genteel glow of White House sconces, plotting a strategy to
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Ken Paxton vs. The Great Texas Hide-and-Seek Championships
Some states have political disagreements. Others have lawsuits. Texas, however, prefers its disputes served with an extra-large glass of iced tea, a dash of high drama, and a courtroom appearance that smells faintly of barbecue smoke and contempt of decorum. The latest entry into this Lone Star political rodeo? Attorney General Ken Paxton’s lawsuit to
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Bayou Bargain: Louisiana Cuts a $9 Million Check for a Bullet in the Back
Sometimes they give out Mardi Gras beads. Louisiana also gives out multimillion-dollar settlements for police misconduct. Different kind of souvenir, same sense of “well, this is just how we do things down here.” The headline was crisp and bureaucratic: Louisiana agrees to a $9 million settlement with a man shot in the back by a
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Times Square: The Stage Where America Performs Its Gun Problem
The thing about Times Square is that it’s designed to make you forget the real world exists. You stand there under billboards taller than small nations, every color cranked to an unnatural vibrancy, and it’s like being trapped inside the internet with no “close tab” button. It is loud. It is crowded. It is lit
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When the Bear Meets the Eagle in a Walmart Parking Lot: Trump, Putin, and the Art of the Ceasefire
On August 15th, President Trump will meet Vladimir Putin in the most geopolitically neutral ground imaginable: Alaska. Not Geneva, not Vienna—Alaska. A location that says, “We could’ve done this at the G7, but we were both craving a halibut sandwich.”
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GPT-5 Has Entered the Chat (and Possibly the Will of God)
The launch of GPT-5 was not announced so much as revealed, the way ancient prophecies emerge from cracked temple walls or a Kardashian reveals a new product line—suddenly, everywhere, and without anyone asking if we were ready. OpenAI calls it the “most advanced AI model to date,” a phrase that lands somewhere between a tech
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When Numbers Lie and the Economy is “Perfect” (According to the Man Who Invented Truth)
It’s another day in America, and the President has once again reminded us that numbers are not to be trusted. Not his numbers, of course—those are gold-plated, patriotic, and possibly blessed by the ghost of Reagan—but other people’s numbers. Specifically, the ones from the Bureau of Labor Statistics that dared to suggest inflation is rising
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Living With Trauma: Scar Tissue Doesn’t Stretch
People talk about trauma like it’s a one-act play:Something happens, the curtain drops, and then we’re supposed to stand up, brush off the popcorn, and walk into the daylight with “lessons learned.” But the truth is, trauma isn’t a play.It’s a residency.It moves in. Pays no rent. Rearranges your furniture without asking. And when it