Latest posts
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America’s Food Safety Is So Broken That Even the Experts Eat Like They’re Disarming a Bomb
When your dinner order starts to sound like a legal deposition, something has gone very wrong There is a moment, somewhere between opening a menu and making eye contact with the waiter, when modern Americans are expected to perform confidence. We scan descriptions of leafy greens and artisanal toppings, nod thoughtfully at words like fresh
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Trump Flirts With Weed Rescheduling and Wall Street Immediately Smokes the Hopium
A CNBC headline, a market rally, and an entire industry watching the federal government like it’s a moody landlord who might finally fix the heater. Cannabis stocks and marijuana-focused ETFs just did that thing they always do when Washington coughs in their direction: they levitated. After a CNBC report said President Donald Trump is expected
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Senate Filibusters Your Healthcare and Calls It Fiscal Discipline
Two 51-48 votes, two dead plans, and a whole lot of lawmakers acting like “imminent” is a decorative word that looks nice in press releases. The U.S. Senate just performed one of its signature magic tricks: taking a cliff, putting a warning sign next to it, posing for photos in front of the warning sign,
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Gavin Newsom Wants Democrats to Be Normal, Even If It Means You Have to Disappear
The Governor of California has discovered the secret to winning 2028, and it involves throwing the most vulnerable people in his coalition into a closet labeled “Later.” There is a specific kind of political epiphany that only happens in rooms where the bottled water costs twelve dollars and the audience is composed entirely of people
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The Federal Reserve Just Handed You a Discount Coupon for a Store That Is On Fire
Jerome Powell is the tired referee in a game where the scoreboard is broken, the players are cheating, and the owner is screaming from the luxury box to let the home team win or else. If you want to understand the current state of the American economy, you do not need to look at a
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The Red Fortress of Miami Has Fallen to a Woman Named Eileen
It turns out that telling a city of immigrants that immigrants are the problem is not a winning strategy, even if you say it in Spanish. In a development that has caused political strategists in Washington to spill their double espressos and check their maps to ensure Miami is still in Florida, Democrat Eileen Higgins
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The Art of the Foreclosure: How the Trump Peace Plan Turned Sovereignty Into a Distressed Asset
We are watching the privatization of geopolitics, where nations are not conquered but liquidated for pennies on the dollar. It was inevitable that the end of the post-war international order would not arrive with a bang or a whimper, but with the slap of a leather portfolio on a mahogany table. The portfolio in question
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The Golden Globes: Where We Pretend to Care About Art While Worshiping at the Altar of Marketing Spend
Paul Thomas Anderson wins the math, but Wicked won the culture, and my heart belongs to a movie about kicking. The Golden Globes have always been the drunk uncle of the awards season family reunion. They are loud, occasionally embarrassing, and usually smell faintly of desperate bribery. But this year, the nominations announcement felt less
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Comey: The DOJ Just Got Locked Out of Its Own Evidence Locker
When you raid a lawyer’s iCloud without reading the Fourth Amendment first, you end up with a restraining order and a very embarrassing weekend. It is a rare and beautiful thing to watch the Department of Justice trip over its own shoelaces in slow motion. Usually, the DOJ is the juggernaut, the unmovable object that
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The Federal Bureau of Influencers: Inside the 115-Page Suicide Note of American Intelligence
The G-men have left the building, and the content creators have moved in. The most terrifying documents in American history are rarely the ones stamped top secret or buried in a bunker in Virginia. They are the ones that are leaked in a panic, the bureaucratic distress flares fired by people who have realized that