Latest posts
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United We Scroll: 100 Things We All Secretly Agree On That Democrats Actually Campaign On While Republicans Pretend Don’t Exist
Every morning, cable news assures us that America is a house divided, a republic hanging by a thread, two tribes locked in a forever war where a neighbor’s yard sign is the moral equivalent of Pearl Harbor. Turn on Fox News and you’ll learn Democrats are Satan’s personal interns. Flip over to MSNBC and Republicans…
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Trump Cancels Talks, Shutdown Clock Ticks Louder
There are rituals in Washington that feel less like governance and more like reruns of a bad reality show. One of the longest-running is the shutdown dance: leaders promise to meet, promise to negotiate, promise to avert disaster—and then someone flips the table, storms out, and insists the other side ruined dinner. This week, the…
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Democracy with a Matchbook: How America Learned to Love Political Violence, Tribalism, and Excel Spreadsheets
Pod Save America did what it does best: deliver the bad news with a podcast ad break for magnesium powder and underwear that “feels like on-body AC.” The guest of honor was Dr. Liliana Mason, Johns Hopkins political scientist and unwilling Cassandra of our collapsing republic. Her subject? The roots of political violence in America…
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The Bots Are Coming From Inside the House
We were warned about the robots. We were told they’d take our jobs, our cars, maybe our dating lives if someone perfected the silicone. What we weren’t prepared for was that they’d take our democracy. And not even in a cool, cinematic Skynet way—no, in the most humiliating way possible: by faking retweets and filling…
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Glorious Chronicle of the Leader’s Magnificent Week
There are few weeks in the long, triumphant reign of our Beloved Commander that shine so brightly as this past one. The sun itself, perhaps fearful of casting a shadow upon his perfect silhouette, rose each day only to illuminate his strong jawline, his vibrant mane, and his posture that would make even the marble…
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A Royal Circus, a Domestic Inquisition, and the Death of Late Night: Trump’s September Trifecta
The Pageant in Windsor There’s no such thing as a small Trump visit. Not when the U.K. rolls out Windsor pomp for a man who treats Buckingham Palace like a casino floor. King Charles III, looking every bit the monarch who once had to weather tabloids about tampon fantasies, gamely escorted Donald Trump through ceremonial…
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Merit, Excellence, and a Half-Billion Dollar Shuffle: The Education Department’s New Hunger Games
The Department of Education has always been a strange beast—part accountant, part social engineer, part referee for our endless cultural blood sports. On September 15, it decided to moonlight as a pit boss, shuffling chips from one table to another, all while insisting this was about “merit and excellence.” Translation: somebody’s walking out of the…
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Pam Bondi Declares War on the First Amendment—Then Googles What It Actually Says
You’d think the Attorney General of the United States would know the First Amendment. You’d think she’d have at least skimmed it once in law school, maybe while flipping through her notes on “How Not to Start a Constitutional Crisis.” And yet here we are. Pam Bondi—Donald Trump’s Attorney General—managed to light Washington on fire…
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The Sundance Kid Rides Off: Robert Redford and the Indie Dream We Pretend Is Still Alive
The Perfect Death for a Perfect Myth Robert Redford died in his sleep at 89. Publicist Cindi Berger said it happened at his home at Sundance, tucked in the Utah mountains near Provo Canyon. No cause given, no final scandal, no messy revelation about a burner phone and a crypto scam. Just a clean exit,…
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Hispanic Heritage Month Cancelled Due to Immigration Enforcement: Culture Meets Checkpoint
The Month That Wasn’t September 15 used to mark the start of Hispanic Heritage Month—a time for parades, mariachi, food festivals, and school assemblies pretending arroz con pollo is “cultural immersion.” This year, it marked something else entirely: postponements and cancellations. Chicago’s El Grito festival? Cancelled. Sacramento’s celebrations? Postponed. Charlotte’s events? Scrapped. CBS, AP, and…