Latest posts

  • Statehood for the States That Aren’t: A Hypothetical Love Letter to Democracy’s Participation Trophy

    Statehood for the States That Aren’t: A Hypothetical Love Letter to Democracy’s Participation Trophy

    There’s a certain kind of American optimism that only emerges when we start talking about statehood, the same bright-eyed, civics-class sparkle that insists representation is a moral right and not a political chess move. But let’s be honest—if every U.S. territory and D.C. were granted statehood tomorrow, the fireworks wouldn’t be about democracy fulfilled. They’d

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  • The Death of Facts: How Ring Wing America Replaced Reality with Programming

    The Death of Facts: How Ring Wing America Replaced Reality with Programming

    There was a time, not all that long ago, when America had one reality. It wasn’t perfect, but at least it was shared. We all tuned in to Walter Cronkite or Peter Jennings or Dan Rather. The evening news would come on, everyone would collectively lower their voices, and for thirty blessed minutes the country

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  • Trump’s America Rediscovers Measles and Other 19th-Century Hobbies

    Trump’s America Rediscovers Measles and Other 19th-Century Hobbies

    Congratulations, America. We’ve finally done it. We’ve brought back a disease that modern medicine already defeated when bell-bottoms were still a gleam in disco’s eye. Somewhere, Jonas Salk is shaking his head in the afterlife, muttering, “I leave you people alone for sixty years and you start playing Oregon Trail again.” According to NPR, the

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  • JD Vance and George Stephanopoulos: Cut to Commercial The New Language of Transparency

    JD Vance and George Stephanopoulos: Cut to Commercial The New Language of Transparency

    It’s a rare thing to see George Stephanopoulos lose patience. The man has survived a decade of D.C. gaslighting and several hundred Trump surrogates without cracking. But on This Week, the famously unflappable anchor finally snapped. He’d spent five full minutes trying to extract a yes or no answer from Vice President JD Vance about

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  • Portland: The Revolution Will Be Choreographed And Feature a Frog

    Portland: The Revolution Will Be Choreographed And Feature a Frog

    It’s 2025, and in Portland, resistance now comes with a soundtrack and a splash zone. The city once branded a “war zone” by right-wing commentators has become something else entirely—a performance art piece starring inflatable amphibians, unicorns, and a surprising number of sharks. The Portland ICE facility—once the backdrop for grim standoffs and militarized optics—has

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  • $2 Trillion in Market Value and Trump’s Truth Social Post Walk Into a Bar

    $2 Trillion in Market Value and Trump’s Truth Social Post Walk Into a Bar

    If the stock market had a safe word, it would’ve screamed it yesterday. In a single trading session, nearly $2 trillion in U.S. market value evaporated after President Donald Trump decided to use Truth Social like it was a nuclear launch console, announcing a 100% tariff on all Chinese imports and tighter export controls. CNBC

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  • Grand Juries & Grandstanding: The Imminent Indictment of John Bolton and the Weaponization of Justice

    Grand Juries & Grandstanding: The Imminent Indictment of John Bolton and the Weaponization of Justice

    On the heels of a government shutdown, a stock market trembling under tariff scares, and a political climate so charged it could detonate, comes news that seems tailor-made for the age of rival prosecutions: former National Security Adviser John Bolton is expected to be indicted as early as next week. FBI agents searched his Maryland

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  • Glitter, Glam, and Grand Larceny: The Real Housewives of Insurance Fraud

    Glitter, Glam, and Grand Larceny: The Real Housewives of Insurance Fraud

    In what can only be described as a collaboration between Law & Order: SVU and Real Housewives of Potomac, NBC News reports that Dr. Wendy Osefo and her husband, Edward, have been arrested in Maryland for allegedly staging a home burglary to collect a fat insurance payout. Yes, you read that right. Another week, another

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  • The Sheikhs of Idaho: How We Accidentally Let Qatar Build a “Not-a-Base” Base in the U.S.

    The Sheikhs of Idaho: How We Accidentally Let Qatar Build a “Not-a-Base” Base in the U.S.

    There’s a new kind of foreign investment in America—one that comes with F-15s, a ten-year commitment, and a PR team insisting it’s definitely not a base. This week, the Pentagon proudly unveiled plans for a Qatar-funded “training complex” at Mountain Home Air Force Base in Idaho, which will host Qatari pilots and their U.S.-made fighter

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  • The Riyadh Comedy Festival Where the Joke Is You

    There’s a new punchline in Riyadh this week, and it isn’t coming from the mouths of Dave Chappelle, Kevin Hart, Bill Burr, or Pete Davidson. It’s the sound of cash registers ringing, echoing louder than any laugh track, in a hall where more than fifty Western comics are performing for Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman

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