Latest posts
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When Random Stops Feeling Rare: What Another Walmart Tragedy Reveals About Us
There’s a point in any crisis-saturated society where the words stop hitting. “Man stabs 11 people at Michigan Walmart. Six in critical condition.” You read it. You blink. You scroll. It’s not that we don’t care—it’s that we can’t process it anymore. The shock we’re supposed to feel has calcified into something else. A dull
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Lock Her Up (But Poor This Time): America Rediscovers Its Favorite Chant—Now with Fewer Mar-a-Lagos
At long last, America’s most beloved political rally cry has returned—not for Hillary, not for Hunter, but for Hannah under the freeway overpass. Yes, “Lock Her Up” has been dusted off, polished, and rebranded for a new demographic: the unhoused. And it’s all thanks to the latest Trump executive order, which proposes the forcible hospitalization
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Trapped Together, Falling Apart: The Real Story Behind Until Further Notice
Start Reading Now:📚 Amazon Author Page📘 Until Further Notice – Free with Kindle Unlimited What happens when your only human contact is a total stranger with a pineapple vape and no sense of boundaries? You write Until Further Notice. This book wasn’t planned. It emerged the way a lot of things did during lockdown—messy, improvised,
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America Redefines “Public Benefits” to Mean “Not for You” — Immigration Policy Just Got a Rebrand
This week, the U.S. government took a long, squinting look at the phrase “public benefits” and said, “What if… we didn’t?” In a move so bureaucratically cruel it could’ve been dreamed up by a focus group trapped in a DMV at gunpoint, the Department of Health and Human Services (HHS) has officially expanded the definition
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While You Were Here: A Love Letter to Daisy, the Girl Who Saved Me
There’s a kind of poetry in loss—a slow, unexpected elegy that weaves through the days, a mournful melody that reminds you that even in absence, someone can fill your life with meaning. While You Were Here isn’t just a story about grief; it’s a fictional memoir about living—and sometimes barely surviving—with Daisy, the little chihuahua
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Trump’s Legs Are Tired. America is Too.
In news that will shock absolutely no one who’s seen a senior citizen in a golf cart wearing three layers of bronzer and rage, Donald Trump has been diagnosed with chronic venous insufficiency (CVI)—which, to the medically uninitiated, translates roughly to: his veins are tired of the bullshit too.
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Make Coca-Cola Sweet Again: Trump Claims Victory Over Corn Syrup
In a groundbreaking act of nutritional diplomacy, former President Donald J. Trump took to social media this week to announce that Coca-Cola—yes, the same company that once snubbed him by allegedly removing Diet Coke from the White House—has finally bent the knee. According to Trump, the soda giant has agreed to replace high-fructose corn syrup
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Rob Kardashian Quits Reality TV—Cites “Emotional Nudity” and Actual Clothing as Reasons
In a revelation that shocked exactly zero therapists but at least three die-hard Kris Jenner fans, Rob Kardashian has finally opened up about why he stepped away from the spotlight in 2017. In a rare interview, the elusive Kardashian brother—last seen in public wearing a baseball cap and existential dread—said he left Keeping Up with
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Budget Cuts and Band-Aids: How to Save America by Abandoning Everyone Else
In a bold display of cost-cutting patriotism, the Senate has advanced President Trump’s request to trim a casual $9 billion off the federal budget—a move that mostly affects programs you didn’t realize were saving lives until yesterday’s headlines told you they might vanish. Among the financial casualties: foreign aid, public broadcasting, and—because irony is apparently
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BUBONIC PLAGUE IN ARIZONA: 14TH CENTURY ICON MAKES UNWELCOME COMEBACK
FLAGSTAFF, AZ — Just when you thought the only plague still circulating was the group chat from your old job, northern Arizona has been struck by a blast from the past — and not the cool, vintage kind. Health officials have confirmed that a local resident has died from pneumonic plague, a grim throwback infection