Latest posts

  • Prestige TV, or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Firehose

    Prestige TV, or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Firehose

    By 2025, prestige television no longer means anything. It’s like calling water wet, or calling Marvel “cinema” just to rile up Scorsese. Prestige used to be rarefied air—The Sopranos, The Wire, Mad Men. Now it’s practically background radiation, humming behind every streaming app. Prestige has metastasized. Every show arrives pre-packaged as “prestige,” the way cereal

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  • The Ten Commandments of Horror TV: A Bloody, Bingeable Bible

    The Ten Commandments of Horror TV: A Bloody, Bingeable Bible

    The history of horror television is a cemetery of failed pilots and half-rotted seasons, a graveyard where shows are buried alive by executives only to claw their way out later as streaming “discoveries.” For every cult resurrection, there are dozens of forgotten corpses—remember Harper’s Island? Exactly. Yet from this restless afterlife, ten shows have not

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  • 107 Days Without Protection: Kamala Harris and the Trump Doctrine of Spite

    107 Days Without Protection: Kamala Harris and the Trump Doctrine of Spite

    On August 29, 2025, President Donald J. Trump did something both petty and perilous, which, to be fair, is his governing style. He revoked the Secret Service protection of former Vice President Kamala Harris—effective September 1—just as she prepares to launch her 107 Days book tour. The timing is not coincidence. It is choreography. Harris

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  • Katrina at 20: America Remembers, Forgets, and Repackages

    Katrina at 20: America Remembers, Forgets, and Repackages

    Twenty years later, America still doesn’t know how to talk about Hurricane Katrina. Not because there’s nothing left to say, but because the event itself was already so saturated in meaning that everything since feels like a remix. The anniversary observances in New Orleans this August were equal parts solemnity and stagecraft—brass-band second lines echoing

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  • The Ellen Files: America’s Favorite Dance Host and the Ghost of Toxic Daytime

    The Ellen Files: America’s Favorite Dance Host and the Ghost of Toxic Daytime

    In the ever-growing genre of daytime television necromancy, few spirits rattle chains as loudly as The Ellen DeGeneres Show. It’s been years since the curtain fell, since the set was struck, since the pastel couches were loaded into some studio storage unit to gather dust beside Tyra’s smize mirrors and Dr. Phil’s paternal disappointment. Yet

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  • The Hunger Games of Gaza: When Bureaucracy Outpaces Bread

    The Hunger Games of Gaza: When Bureaucracy Outpaces Bread

    On August 22, 2025, the United Nations confirmed what the world has been watching for months but refusing to name out loud: famine in Gaza City. Not “food insecurity.” Not “malnutrition.” Not “grave concern.” Famine. IPC Phase 5—the technical apocalypse of humanitarian metrics. The Famine Review Committee ticked the boxes: The tally: over 514,000 people

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  • Cracker Barrel’s $94 Million Makeover: Uncle Herschel, Dumped by Wall Street

    Cracker Barrel’s $94 Million Makeover: Uncle Herschel, Dumped by Wall Street

    There are breakups that shake families. There are divorces that fracture communities. And then there’s Cracker Barrel firing Uncle Herschel from its logo, which—according to Wall Street—destroyed nearly $200 million in value before the breakfast crowd even finished their biscuits. On August 21, Cracker Barrel’s stock tanked 7.2%, closing at $54.80 and wiping out about

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  • MAGAfication of the Bureaucracy: How Trump’s America Turned Government Into a Loyalty Points Program

    MAGAfication of the Bureaucracy: How Trump’s America Turned Government Into a Loyalty Points Program

    On August 21, 2025, the reporting was clear: the Trump administration is not merely running the federal government; it is remaking it in its own neon-orange image. In place of career expertise, apolitical fact-checking, and that pesky thing called “institutional memory,” we now have a White House governed by loyalty oaths, Silicon Valley imports, and

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  • Deep in the Heart of Gerrymander: Texas Republicans Redraw the Map (Again)

    Deep in the Heart of Gerrymander: Texas Republicans Redraw the Map (Again)

    Texas, land of wide skies, brisket smoke, and congressional maps redrawn so often you’d think they were doodles in the back of Greg Abbott’s notebook. On August 20, 2025, the Texas House passed yet another Republican-engineered mid-decade redistricting plan during a special session—because if at first you don’t succeed at democracy, just redraw it until

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  • Goodbye Clearances, Hello Creamed Corn: Gabbard’s Security-Purge Reality Show

    Goodbye Clearances, Hello Creamed Corn: Gabbard’s Security-Purge Reality Show

    What happened today? Director of National Intelligence Tulsi Gabbard announced she’s revoking security clearances for 37 current and former “intelligence professionals,” alleging they “politicized and manipulated intelligence.” She insisted the move was made at President Trump’s direction. Let’s unpack this with surgical precision—because this isn’t a policy shift. This is the messy performance art of

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