Latest posts
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Will Smith Drops New Album, Slaps Us with Feelings (This Time, With Consent)
Let it be known: the Fresh Prince is back—but this time, he’s less “Parents Just Don’t Understand” and more “My Inner Child Just Called CPS.” Yes, after two decades of radio silence (and one globally televised moment that turned every Oscar afterparty into a group therapy session), Will Smith has returned to music with a
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Mandy Moore’s Drive for Justice in a Hit-and-Run America
There’s a particular kind of poetic justice in watching the star of This Is Us become the accidental spokesperson for This Is You, Actually—on the Run, in a Late-Model SUV. Yes, Mandy Moore, once America’s sweetheart in a pastel prom dress and now everyone’s trauma doula in prime-time weepies, has taken to Instagram to do
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Why Thanks for the House, Stupid Might Be the Most Honest Love Story You’ll Read This Year
ChatGPT said: “We grieved him differently. He fell apart; I took inventory.” Thanks for the House, Stupid is a darkly funny, emotionally wrecked queer romantic dramedy where grief throws two ex-rivals into forced cohabitation—and maybe something like healing. Haunted, horny, and halfway healed.
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Gen Z Lives at Home Because They’re Smart, Not Lazy—And Also Because Rent Is a Crime Now
Let’s all take a deep breath and thank Generation Z. No, not for their TikTok dances or the fact that they somehow revived low-rise jeans, but for refusing to play the rigged Monopoly game we keep handing them and asking, “Why don’t you just buy Boardwalk?” They’re not buying Boardwalk. They’re moving back into Marvin
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July’s Over. Thank You, Everyone: 7,174 Books Sold, 64 Titles Published, and One Heart About to Burst
In July, I sold 7,174 books across 64 titles—my first full month of self-publishing after years of silence and shelved manuscripts. From memoir to romance to horror, you showed up. Thank you. Every read, share, and review keeps this dream alive.
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Alone Together™: How to Cure Loneliness with Wi-Fi, Vague Eye Contact, and Corporate Wellness Emails
If you’re feeling lonely in 2025, good news: you’re not alone. You are, in fact, part of a globally trending demographic—a vast, echoing chorus of fully-charged devices and emotionally uncharged people, all sending each other “just checking in” texts while lying motionless on separate couches. We live in the most hyper-connected society in history. You
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Make MAGA Merch Great Again: Trump Sues Over Bootleg Bravado
In the latest crusade to restore dignity to the tarnished gold plating of American capitalism, the Trump Organization has boldly risen—not to address climate change, or rampant voter suppression, or the existential dread gripping the working class—but to defend its most sacred cause: the sanctity of fake red hats. Yes, dear patriots and profit-mongers, Amazon
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“The Apprentice: Pedophile Island Edition” – Trump’s Memory Hole Has a VIP Suite
Imagine, if you will, a former U.S. President—orange of hue, slippery of truth—waddling back onto the stage of public opinion not with grace, not with remorse, but with the uncooked swagger of a man who believes facts are just party guests you can disinvite later. Now picture that same man casually acknowledging that yes, one
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Loyalty, Glitter, and Crime: Why You’ll Fall Hard for the Found-Family Chaos of Hell’s Kitchen Sink
Hell’s Kitchen SinkAlso by Brandon Cloud What if your second chance came with a busted boiler, cartel surveillance, and a drag queen crying behind the bar at 2am? That’s where the story begins in Hell’s Kitchen Sink—a gritty, sharp-witted, deeply human novel about queer survival, found family, and the kind of loyalty that sometimes slides