Latest posts

  • Cardi B v. The Courtroom: When Justice Goes Viral

    Cardi B v. The Courtroom: When Justice Goes Viral

    By the summer of 2025, America had already transformed nearly every human institution into content. Elections are Twitch streams. Presidential debates are meme generators. Even funerals trend if the right celebrity posts a photo. It was only a matter of time before the courtroom—long a solemn stage for justice—was converted into a live-action reality show.

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  • Tariffs, Treason, and the Long Con of Executive Power

    Tariffs, Treason, and the Long Con of Executive Power

    On August 29, 2025, the U.S. Federal Circuit Court of Appeals, in a 7–4 ruling, finally tapped the brakes on what has essentially been a seven-year joyride through the Constitution conducted by Donald J. Trump in the name of “economic nationalism.” The court declared that most of his so-called “reciprocal” and “trafficking” tariffs exceeded his

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  • Prosecuting the Flame: Trump’s Executive Order on Flag Burning

    Prosecuting the Flame: Trump’s Executive Order on Flag Burning

    On August 25, 2025, President Donald Trump signed a document so melodramatically titled it could double as a Netflix limited series: “Prosecuting Burning of the American Flag.” The executive order doesn’t criminalize flag burning outright—because the Supreme Court told America to chill about that back in 1989. But it does something more Trumpian: it takes

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  • Cracker Barrel’s $94 Million Makeover: Uncle Herschel, Dumped by Wall Street

    Cracker Barrel’s $94 Million Makeover: Uncle Herschel, Dumped by Wall Street

    There are breakups that shake families. There are divorces that fracture communities. And then there’s Cracker Barrel firing Uncle Herschel from its logo, which—according to Wall Street—destroyed nearly $200 million in value before the breakfast crowd even finished their biscuits. On August 21, Cracker Barrel’s stock tanked 7.2%, closing at $54.80 and wiping out about

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  • Deportation by Stopwatch: Trump’s TPS Hunger Games

    Deportation by Stopwatch: Trump’s TPS Hunger Games

    The Trump administration has rediscovered its favorite pastime: deportation as sport. On August 20, 2025, the Ninth Circuit Court of Appeals granted the White House an emergency stay that lets officials move forward with ending Temporary Protected Status (TPS) for roughly 60,000 migrants from Honduras, Nicaragua, and Nepal. Nothing says “America First” like telling the

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  • Hurricane Erin: America’s Latest Reality Show, Now Streaming Live from the Atlantic

    Hurricane Erin: America’s Latest Reality Show, Now Streaming Live from the Atlantic

    It’s August 2025, and Hurricane Erin—currently whirling itself into a Category 2 diva act about 200 miles off the North Carolina coast—is serving as yet another reminder that America’s infrastructure is mostly just plywood, wishful thinking, and a governor’s press conference stapled to a sandbag. Erin, once a strapping Category 5 beast, has now “weakened”

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  • Netflix Giveth, Netflix Taketh Away: A Funeral March for the Shows We Loved

    Netflix Giveth, Netflix Taketh Away: A Funeral March for the Shows We Loved

    The streaming economy is nothing if not biblical: seven years of plenty, seven years of famine, seven executives screaming “cut costs!” while canceling your comfort show. And so, on August 17, Netflix opened the velvet curtain to reveal the latest mass grave of content. FUBAR? Dead. The Residence? Evicted. Pulse? Flatline. The Recruit? Dishonorably discharged.

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  • Nicolle Wallace, Trump’s New Nemesis: When “MSNBC IS DEAD!” Becomes a Campaign Platform

    Nicolle Wallace, Trump’s New Nemesis: When “MSNBC IS DEAD!” Becomes a Campaign Platform

    It always starts the same way with Donald Trump: a half-formed grunt of a post, a cryptic one-word drop (“Bela”), and then the digital jackals descend. A follower serves up a meme, Trump slaps his digital stamp of approval on it, and suddenly we’re all trapped in the world’s saddest reboot of Mad Men, except

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  • The Parasocial Comfort Blanket: Why SmartLess Owns My Brain

    The Parasocial Comfort Blanket: Why SmartLess Owns My Brain

    It’s not easy to admit that the most stable relationship in my life right now involves three middle-aged white men who don’t know I exist. And yet, here I am, another hopelessly devoted listener of SmartLess, the podcast where Jason Bateman, Will Arnett, and Sean Hayes invite celebrity guests, mispronounce each other’s words, interrupt constantly,

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  • The Dust in the Sunlight: Why I Stopped Waiting and Hit Publish

    The Dust in the Sunlight: Why I Stopped Waiting and Hit Publish

    Thank you for being here—for reading to the bottom, for believing longform isn’t dead, for understanding that the dust in the sunlight is not failure but evidence. Evidence that we’ve been moving, living, changing the air. These books are my evidence. I hope one of them becomes yours.

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