Latest posts
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The Church of Selective Justice: Saint George of Santos and the Gospel of Trumpian Mercy
There are miracles, and then there are Trump-era miracles — the kind that make you question if God outsourced justice to a reality show producer. George Santos, the man who lied about everything from his résumé to his existence as a mammal capable of shame, just walked out of federal prison after less than three
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Prince Andrew’s Title Tantrum: When the Crown Smells Smoke From the Epstein Files
There’s something about the smell of royal scandal that hits differently—less like smoke and more like an expensive candle trying to cover up the scent of a body decomposing under the palace floorboards. The official word from Buckingham Palace this week is that Prince Andrew, formerly the Duke of York, is voluntarily “stepping back” from
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Trump’s Failing Ceasefire That’s Cosplaying As A Peace Plan
At the midpoint between “mission accomplished” and “please hold,” the Gaza ceasefire now lives in the liminal space where optimism is just fatigue wearing better clothes. Cameras caught the handshakes, the solemn statements, the flags arranged like theater props—but now the applause has faded, and the work has begun to creak under its own paperwork.
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The Hatch Act: The Law That Everyone Violates and No One Enforces
Somewhere in the dusty filing cabinets of American democracy, beneath the “Do Not Remove Under Penalty of Law” mattress tags and the ghost of civics classes past, lies the Hatch Act. Passed in 1939, it was meant to be the firewall between government work and campaign work. The promise was simple: no mixing taxpayer business
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When You Fire the Weatherman, Don’t Act Surprised When the Sky Kills You
America loves a good disaster, as long as it happens far enough away to make for cinematic B-roll. The Bering Sea monster that shredded western Alaska this week—one part typhoon, one part apocalypse—checked all the right boxes: 100-mile-per-hour winds, a record storm surge, homes swallowed whole, hundreds displaced, one confirmed death, and a governor insisting
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The Death of Facts: How Ring Wing America Replaced Reality with Programming
There was a time, not all that long ago, when America had one reality. It wasn’t perfect, but at least it was shared. We all tuned in to Walter Cronkite or Peter Jennings or Dan Rather. The evening news would come on, everyone would collectively lower their voices, and for thirty blessed minutes the country
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The Last WTF: Marc Maron, Barack Obama, and the Funeral for American Adulthood
There’s a particular tone you can hear only in the voice of a man who has seen the apocalypse, accepted it, and still shows up for soundcheck. Marc Maron has been that voice for sixteen years—equal parts therapy session, post-mortem, and open-mic confession booth—and on October 13, 2025, he turned off the mic for good.
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When the Cult of Personality Goes Biblical: Trump as the Antichrist (From An Atheist Who Doesn’t Believe in Such Things)
There’s an old superstition that when the world begins to eat itself, a showman appears to tell it the apocalypse is just a ratings opportunity. Even if you don’t believe in God, hell, or horned beasts rising from the sea, you have to admit that Donald Trump’s recent “peace deal” in the Middle East reads
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JD Vance and George Stephanopoulos: Cut to Commercial The New Language of Transparency
It’s a rare thing to see George Stephanopoulos lose patience. The man has survived a decade of D.C. gaslighting and several hundred Trump surrogates without cracking. But on This Week, the famously unflappable anchor finally snapped. He’d spent five full minutes trying to extract a yes or no answer from Vice President JD Vance about
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When the Curtain Falls: Diane Keaton Leaves a World Unworthy of Her Talent
I want to start by acknowledging that writing satire about someone’s death is delicate—especially when the person is beloved, irreplaceable, and has left an indelible mark on our lives. Diane Keaton’s passing on October 11, 2025, at age 79, is real grief; the only ironic jabs I’ll risk are at the world she leaves behind,