Latest posts
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The Board of Directors for Reality™: How Seven Men Bought the Sky and Sold Us the Weather
We operate under a shared and comforting delusion that the “public square” is a real place. We imagine it as a civic commons, a dusty but noble agora where ideas clash, truth eventually rises to the top like cream, and the collective will of the people is forged in the fires of debate. This is
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The Myth of the “Good Old Days”: A Thanksgiving Toast to the Eras That Tried to Erase Us
We gather here today, in the warm glow of incandescent bulbs and familial obligation, to perform the sacred ritual of forced gratitude. The table is set. The turkey is dry. The cranberry sauce retains the ridges of the can, a gelatinous monument to industrial efficiency. And around the perimeter, a collection of relatives—some beloved, some
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The Politics of the Kids’ Table: A Survival Guide for the Holidays
The cranberry sauce is shaped like the can. The turkey is dry enough to be used as attic insulation. The tension in the room is vibrating at a frequency usually reserved for bomb disposal units or hostage negotiations. Welcome to Thanksgiving in America. We are gathered here today to worship at the altar of “Family
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The unauthorized History of the Home of the Brave: A Guide to 400 Years of squatter’s Rights
We like to tell ourselves a very specific story about the United States. It is a story printed on glossy brochures, recited by politicians with wet eyes, and taught to children before they are old enough to read the footnotes. It is the story of a “Nation of Immigrants,” a melting pot where the tired,
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The First Illegal Aliens Wore Buckle Shoes: A Thanksgiving Guide to Stolen Land and Hypocrisy
The truth is that America is a messy, violent, beautiful, hypocritical project. It is a country capable of profound generosity and staggering cruelty. We are a nation of immigrants who hate immigrants. We are a nation born of revolution that fears change. We are a nation of stolen land that is obsessed with property rights.
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The Great American Price Gouge: Why Your Grocery Bill Is a Corporate Ransom Note
The modern American experience is defined by a very specific, recurring moment of vertigo that occurs standing in the aisle of a fluorescent-lit grocery store. You are holding a box of cereal, a product made of corn dust and sugar that costs pennies to manufacture, and you are staring at a price tag that suggests
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Trump Wants His 1998 Back: Why ‘Rush Hour 4’ Is Now a Matter of National Security
We often tell ourselves that power is about nuclear codes, interest rates, and the invisible hand that moves aircraft carriers across the chessboard of the Pacific. But in the twilight of the American empire, power is apparently the ability to force a major Hollywood studio to greenlight a buddy cop sequel that nobody asked for
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The Heritage Foundation: The Think Tank That Stopped Thinking to Survive
The Heritage Foundation was once the cerebral cortex of the American Right. For decades, it was the place where guys in bow ties wrote 900-page white papers on enterprise zones and missile defense systems, confident that Ronald Reagan would read the executive summary and change the world. It was a factory for “ideas”—dry, often heartless,
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The Star-Spangled Bot Farm: How Elon Accidentally Doxxed the “America First” Foreign Legion
There is a specific kind of schadenfreude that tastes like champagne mixed with battery acid, and on November 20, 2025, the internet drank deep from the cup. For years, we have been told that the “silent majority” is rising, that the roar of the MAGA movement is the organic, thundering voice of the forgotten American
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The Greatest Scam Ever Sold: How They Convinced You the Guy Next to You Stole Your Wallet
The central crisis of American life is not that we are spending too much money on avocado toast. It is not that the government is printing too much cash to fund “woke” library books. It is not even the terrifying prospect that a drag queen might read a story to a child in a public