Latest posts

  • The New Perjury Standard: A Partisan Scalpel For Comey

    The New Perjury Standard: A Partisan Scalpel For Comey

    Somewhere between the solemnity of congressional hearings and the cheap thrill of cable news lies a phrase so heavy it used to rattle marble columns: lying to Congress. It once suggested disgrace, a scarlet letter on a public servant’s record. Now it is being hauled out as a courtroom cudgel, with prosecutors preparing to indict

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  • United We Scroll: 100 Things We All Secretly Agree On That Democrats Actually Campaign On While Republicans Pretend Don’t Exist

    United We Scroll: 100 Things We All Secretly Agree On That Democrats Actually Campaign On While Republicans Pretend Don’t Exist

    Every morning, cable news assures us that America is a house divided, a republic hanging by a thread, two tribes locked in a forever war where a neighbor’s yard sign is the moral equivalent of Pearl Harbor. Turn on Fox News and you’ll learn Democrats are Satan’s personal interns. Flip over to MSNBC and Republicans

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  • When Separation of Powers Becomes Separation Anxiety

    When Separation of Powers Becomes Separation Anxiety

    The Supreme Court has once again reminded us that the Constitution is less a sacred text and more a choose-your-own-adventure paperback where one ending includes civil liberties and the other ends with Donald Trump auditioning for The Apprentice: Federal Agencies Edition. On September 22, 2025, the Court—in a tidy little 6–3 order—handed President Trump what

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  • Jimmy Kimmel Live, Dead, and Resurrected: Disney, the FCC, and America’s New Speech Test

    Jimmy Kimmel Live, Dead, and Resurrected: Disney, the FCC, and America’s New Speech Test

    Disney can reanimate cartoon deer and resurrect billion-dollar franchises, but even they didn’t think they’d have to stage a primetime Lazarus trick for Jimmy Kimmel. Yet here we are. After an extraordinary two-week suspension of Jimmy Kimmel Live!—a late-night show that once got canceled only for recycling too many “Matt Damon” bits—Disney announced the show

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  • Glorious Chronicle of the Leader’s Magnificent Week

    Glorious Chronicle of the Leader’s Magnificent Week

    There are few weeks in the long, triumphant reign of our Beloved Commander that shine so brightly as this past one. The sun itself, perhaps fearful of casting a shadow upon his perfect silhouette, rose each day only to illuminate his strong jawline, his vibrant mane, and his posture that would make even the marble

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  • The Strongman Starter Pack: From Manila to Mar-a-Lago

    The Strongman Starter Pack: From Manila to Mar-a-Lago

    Rodrigo Duterte’s rise in the Philippines wasn’t an accident—it was a case study in how democracies willingly hand the keys to strongmen when fear, spectacle, and fatigue collide. Donald Trump is running the same script in America: cult of personality, demonization of enemies, attacks on the press, selective empathy, institutional erosion, and an endless blurring…

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  • Trump’s War on the Press: Now With 97% More Whining

    Trump’s War on the Press: Now With 97% More Whining

    America, pull up a chair, because the President has once again declared war on the one enemy that never invaded him, never stormed his casinos, and never ghosted him on Tinder: the press. Yes, the man who built his political career by calling CNN “fake news” has decided the time has come to escalate from

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  • A Royal Circus, a Domestic Inquisition, and the Death of Late Night: Trump’s September Trifecta

    A Royal Circus, a Domestic Inquisition, and the Death of Late Night: Trump’s September Trifecta

    The Pageant in Windsor There’s no such thing as a small Trump visit. Not when the U.K. rolls out Windsor pomp for a man who treats Buckingham Palace like a casino floor. King Charles III, looking every bit the monarch who once had to weather tabloids about tampon fantasies, gamely escorted Donald Trump through ceremonial

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  • The American Love Affair With ARs: From Domestic Disputes to Funeral Processions

    The American Love Affair With ARs: From Domestic Disputes to Funeral Processions

    A Familiar Script Another day, another “isolated incident” that looks exactly like every other one. A young man, a domestic violence record, a weapon designed for war, and a police force walking into a house in North Codorus Township. The ending, like all the others, is a chalk outline in triplicate. Three detectives dead, two

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  • Pam Bondi Declares War on the First Amendment—Then Googles What It Actually Says

    Pam Bondi Declares War on the First Amendment—Then Googles What It Actually Says

    You’d think the Attorney General of the United States would know the First Amendment. You’d think she’d have at least skimmed it once in law school, maybe while flipping through her notes on “How Not to Start a Constitutional Crisis.” And yet here we are. Pam Bondi—Donald Trump’s Attorney General—managed to light Washington on fire

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