Latest posts

  • Apocalypse Now, But Make It Truth Social

    Apocalypse Now, But Make It Truth Social

    On September 6, 2025, President Donald J. Trump escalated his “law-and-order” offensive in Chicago not with a policy paper, not with a briefing, not even with a garbled campaign rally rant. No, he escalated with Photoshop. The President of the United States posted an Apocalypse Now–style image of himself looming over a flaming Chicago skyline,

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  • The Jobs Report That Wasn’t a Crash, Just a Stall With the Seatbelt Light On

    The Jobs Report That Wasn’t a Crash, Just a Stall With the Seatbelt Light On

    On September 5, 2025, the August jobs report landed like an anemic cough. U.S. nonfarm payrolls rose by a mere 22,000, a number so small you could tuck it into a single suburban warehouse and still have space for a pickleball court. The unemployment rate ticked up to 4.3%, the highest in nearly four years.

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  • Robert F. Kennedy Jr. vs. Science: The Senate Hearing That Doubled as a Public Health Funeral

    Robert F. Kennedy Jr. vs. Science: The Senate Hearing That Doubled as a Public Health Funeral

    On September 4, 2025, Robert F. Kennedy Jr.—yes, that Kennedy, now moonlighting as the nation’s Health and Human Services Secretary—sat before the Senate Finance Committee for a grilling so blistering it should’ve required SPF 100. What unfolded was three hours of bipartisan carnage, a hearing less about policy than about the collective horror of watching

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  • Jimmy Kimmel vs. The Delicate, Chubby Little Teacup

    Jimmy Kimmel vs. The Delicate, Chubby Little Teacup

    On September 2, 2025, Jimmy Kimmel returned from a two-month vacation and delivered a monologue so sharp you could butter your toast with it. He didn’t just dip into politics. He torched the President of the United States with the glee of a man who’d been storing up insults in a Notes app all summer.

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  • Silence, Thumbs-Up, and the Gospel of Conditional Love

    Silence, Thumbs-Up, and the Gospel of Conditional Love

    My family has been estranged from me for most of my life. That word—estranged—sounds tidy, like it was a clean break. It wasn’t. It was a thousand little cuts, quiet exiles, and whispered reminders that I was never going to belong. I never really fit there. Maybe it was who I was. Maybe it was

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  • Trump vs. Harvard: When Federal Grants Become Campaign Props

    Trump vs. Harvard: When Federal Grants Become Campaign Props

    On September 3, 2025, U.S. District Judge Allison D. Burroughs did something rare in modern America: she called bullshit in a ruling and put the federal government back in its constitutional corner. Her decision ordered the Trump administration to unfreeze nearly $2.2 billion in research grants to Harvard, a freeze that was less about academic

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  • Knock Knock, Who’s There? America’s Gun Obsession Killing Kids Over Doorbells

    Knock Knock, Who’s There? America’s Gun Obsession Killing Kids Over Doorbells

    On late August 30 in east Houston, 11-year-old Jullian Guzman did what children have done for generations: ring a neighbor’s doorbell and run. It was mischief, not malice. A prank so old it predates TikTok “challenges,” one of those goofy rites of childhood designed to make kids laugh and adults groan. Instead, it got him

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  • The Hypersonic Parade: Beijing’s Memory War in 4K

    The Hypersonic Parade: Beijing’s Memory War in 4K

    On September 3, 2025, Beijing decided history was too important to leave to textbooks—or perhaps too fragile. The 80th anniversary of Japan’s WWII surrender was reimagined as a Victory Day military parade so vast it made even the most overproduced Marvel finale look subtle. The setting: Tiananmen Square. The guest list: Xi Jinping, flanked like

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  • SNL at 50: The Joke That Outlived the Punchline

    SNL at 50: The Joke That Outlived the Punchline

    When Saturday Night Live premiered in 1975, the country had just watched Nixon resign, Vietnam collapse, and disco rise. The show was a weekly release valve, part sketch comedy, part cultural exorcism. It wasn’t supposed to last—it was literally called “Saturday Night” because NBC needed to plug a hole in the schedule. Five decades later,

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  • ICE Storm: Trump, Kristi Noem, and the Great Chicago Occupation

    ICE Storm: Trump, Kristi Noem, and the Great Chicago Occupation

    The Trump administration has a way of treating cities like wayward children—Chicago most of all. For decades, conservative politicians have invoked it as shorthand for chaos, crime, and everything wrong with “blue America.” To them, Chicago is less a place where millions of people live, work, and build lives, and more a stage for proving

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