Latest posts
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The Ham Sandwich Walks Free: The Department of Justice Keeps Losing Arguments with Reality
The Justice Department keeps pulling the lever, and the indictment machine keeps blinking “try again” like it’s a broken arcade game with federal letterhead. There are a few sacred American traditions you can set your watch by, even if nobody can agree what time it is anymore. One is that a federal grand jury will
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The Freedom to Go Broke: Republicans Unveil Their Plan to Liberate You From Affordable Healthcare
The GOP has finally found a solution to the problem of people having health insurance. It involves taking the money away and giving you a coupon for a savings account you cannot afford to fund. There is a specific kind of grim comedy that defines American healthcare policy. It is the comedy of a man
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The Golden Globes: Where We Pretend to Care About Art While Worshiping at the Altar of Marketing Spend
Paul Thomas Anderson wins the math, but Wicked won the culture, and my heart belongs to a movie about kicking. The Golden Globes have always been the drunk uncle of the awards season family reunion. They are loud, occasionally embarrassing, and usually smell faintly of desperate bribery. But this year, the nominations announcement felt less
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Jasmine Crockett for Senate: The Only Socialist in Texas is the Guy Writing Checks to Elon Musk
They are going to call Jasmine Crockett a socialist.1 Of course they are. In the modern Republican lexicon, “socialist” is just a synonym for “person I am afraid of,” and right now, there is nobody the Texas GOP fears more than the Congresswoman from Dallas who treats a committee hearing like a cross-examination and a
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The Divorce of the Century: Marjorie Taylor Greene Leaves the Cult
When the most loyal soldier in the MAGA army decides to go AWOL, it isn’t a political pivot; it is a primal scream from inside the house. The marriage between Donald Trump and Marjorie Taylor Greene was never going to end with a quiet mediation and a shared custody agreement for the base. It was
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The Pipe Bomber Was Never a Ghost. He Was Just a Guy With a Rewards Card.
After five years of conspiracy theories about fed-surrectionists and secret operatives, the grand mystery resolves into a Nissan Sentra and a bag of galvanized pipe. We have spent nearly five years living inside a collective fever dream regarding the events of January 5 and 6, 2021. In the absence of an arrest, the “J6 Pipe
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DOJ To Release Grand Jury Epstein Information, Supposedly
On December 19, the United States government will attempt a new experiment: telling the truth about how it let a monster run a catering service for predators. There is a specific kind of silence that descends upon a room when the lights are suddenly turned on at a party that has gone on far too
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The Cartography of Coercion: How the Supreme Court Just Turned Texas into a Republican Fortress
Democracy isn’t dying in darkness; it’s being rezoned in broad daylight with a high-resolution plotter. Somewhere in a windowless room in Austin, under the hum of fluorescent lights and the whir of cooling fans, a team of political cartographers is high-fiving. They have just pulled off the heist of the century, and they didn’t even
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Olivia Nuzzi’s American Canto: The Art of Selling a Scandal Without Actually Selling the Goods
When the memoir is less a reckoning and more a press release written in the font of a nervous breakdown. The collapse of a reputation in Washington usually follows a predictable physics. There is the initial transgression, followed by the frantic denial, the inevitable leak of digital receipts, the forced resignation, and finally the exile
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Pete Hegseth Should Have Stuck With Fox News
When the chain of command becomes a group chat, the only thing securing the nation is the battery life of Pete Hegseth’s iPhone. The modern theatre of war is no longer a dimly lit room filled with cigarette smoke and maps pushed around by grim-faced men in uniform. It is not the hushed, sterile environment