Latest posts
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The Algorithm Can Smell Your Authenticity—So Make It Cry
On Brand, Off Script, and Just Vulnerable Enough to Sell Something Let’s be honest: in 2025, “storytelling” has become the avocado toast of branding—everywhere, wildly overpriced, and weaponized by people who swear their morning routine involves a gratitude journal and a $400 candle. But here’s the thing: storytelling still works. Not because audiences are gullible,
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Unpacking the “One Big Beautiful Bill”: How Congress Plans to Save You (and By You, We Mean Billionaires)
Ah, the smell of freshly printed legislation. Notes of performative optimism, charred loopholes, and a faint aftertaste of lobbyist cologne. Congress has emerged from its biannual nap to deliver what they’re calling the “One Big Beautiful Bill”—a tax and spending package so shiny, so sweeping, it’s practically Botox for the economy. But like most things
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The Soft Launch Isn’t a Phase. It’s a Warning.
Read All My Books on Amazon | The Soft Launch – Available Now Free to Read with Kindle Unlimited Let’s get one thing straight: this isn’t a story about falling in love. It’s about falling into something—messy, curated, emotionally reckless—and realizing too late that you want it to be real. The Soft Launch isn’t sweet.
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Cracks in the Skye: Boeing, Whistleblowers, and the Art of Selective Visibility
It’s comforting to know that in an era of war crimes livestreamed and billionaires cosplaying as messiahs, there’s still a place for the classics: corporate negligence, government complicity, and a plane held together with vibes. Enter Boeing, the Willy Wonka of aviation. Except instead of chocolate rivers, we get panel blowouts at 16,000 feet, and
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Fake It Till You Mean It: When Pretending Feels Like the Truth
📚 See all my books on Amazon🔗 Free on Kindle Unlimited: Fake It Till You Mean It I started writing Fake It Till You Mean It in 2015. Back then, it was lighter. A queer romcom with fake dating, wedding chaos, and just enough sarcasm to keep the feelings at bay. It was fun. Clever.
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Coldplay, Cheating, and Capitalism: The Astronomer Scandal Was Written in the Stars
Let’s set the scene: Gillette Stadium. The lights are low. The band is Coldplay—because of course it is. “A Sky Full of Stars” crescendos like the emotional climax of a mid-2000s rom-com. And right as the chorus hits, the jumbotron zooms in on two people who look like they’ve just discovered physical touch. Only it’s
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Trump’s Legs Are Tired. America is Too.
In news that will shock absolutely no one who’s seen a senior citizen in a golf cart wearing three layers of bronzer and rage, Donald Trump has been diagnosed with chronic venous insufficiency (CVI)—which, to the medically uninitiated, translates roughly to: his veins are tired of the bullshit too.
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Second Term, Second Verse: Dumber, Meaner, Somehow More Orange
Let’s begin this enchanted retread with a little déjà vu: Donald J. Trump, once again sitting in the Oval Office—this time without even pretending to read the Constitution. It’s not a reboot, friends. It’s a bloated sequel nobody asked for, written by Facebook uncles and powered by supply chain rage, Bud Light boycotts, and the
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70 Years of Mousewash: Disneyland’s Diamond-Encrusted Nostalgia Parade Rolls On
Well folks, the House of Mouse has hit the big 7-0. That’s right—Disneyland Resort is celebrating its 70th Anniversary, proving that with enough corporate synergy, artificial joy, and nostalgia-steeped branding, even a theme park can become a religion. And like any good American faith, this one comes with overpriced snacks, emotionally manipulative musicals, and a
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Make Coca-Cola Sweet Again: Trump Claims Victory Over Corn Syrup
In a groundbreaking act of nutritional diplomacy, former President Donald J. Trump took to social media this week to announce that Coca-Cola—yes, the same company that once snubbed him by allegedly removing Diet Coke from the White House—has finally bent the knee. According to Trump, the soda giant has agreed to replace high-fructose corn syrup