Latest posts
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Move Over, The Notebook—My Boyfriend Moved to a Shithole For Me
Romeo drank poison for love.Jack froze to death in the North Atlantic.Allie gave up wealth and status for Noah’s sweaty carpentry chest. And Matthew?Matthew moved to Abilene, Texas. And that, dear reader, is what we call a real-ass love story. Let’s be honest—every great romance needs a setting.Pride and Prejudice had the English countryside.When Harry
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Depth Charges and Daddy Issues: America’s Favorite Strongman Plays Battleship With the World
In a turn of events that could only be described as “textbook masculine fragility but with submarines,” former President Donald J. Trump has responded to a so-called “highly provocative” statement from Russia not with diplomacy, nor with tact, nor even with a sharply worded tweet—but with the deployment of two nuclear submarines. Because nothing says
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Why Thanks for the House, Stupid Might Be the Most Honest Love Story You’ll Read This Year
ChatGPT said: “We grieved him differently. He fell apart; I took inventory.” Thanks for the House, Stupid is a darkly funny, emotionally wrecked queer romantic dramedy where grief throws two ex-rivals into forced cohabitation—and maybe something like healing. Haunted, horny, and halfway healed.
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We All Live in a TikTok Now: How Pop Culture in 2025 Became an Algorithm Wearing Lip Gloss
Pop culture used to be a mirror. It reflected us—warped, stylized, a little hungover—but recognizable. Now it’s more like a funhouse trapdoor. You open Instagram to check your ex’s vacation photos and fall face-first into a sped-up Olivia Rodrigo remix choreographed by six 19-year-olds in matching depression hoodies. Somewhere, a Marvel spinoff trailer auto-plays. Somewhere
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Facts, Fiction, and That Guy from High School Who’s Now a Virologist, Economist, and War Historian
Once upon a time—let’s call it the before times—truth had a certain charm. It was slower, harder to reach, and required more than a Canva infographic and a TikTok voiceover to feel real. Then the internet happened, and suddenly everyone’s Aunt Donna was a part-time epidemiologist with a minor in constitutional law and a doctorate
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Burnt Toast, Bad Timing, and the Right Person Anyway: Why After the Toast Isn’t Just a Love Story
Amazon Author Page | Read After the Toast Romantic comedies are supposed to be light, right?Flirty glances. Cute mishaps. Big gestures and bigger payoffs. But what if the romance starts with a panic attack at a wedding? What if the laughter comes with grief? What if the meet-cute includes the wrong twin and a slice
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Witch Hunt or Fever Dream? Trump Declares War on Kamala, Beyoncé, and Oprah—Because Apparently the Moon Was Booked
In a move that would be deeply concerning if it weren’t also deeply incoherent, former President Donald J. Trump has called for the prosecution of Vice President Kamala Harris, cultural deity Beyoncé Knowles-Carter, and global empathy czarina Oprah Winfrey in connection with…the Epstein fallout. Yes, that Epstein fallout. The conspiracy theory that refuses to die,
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Windmills, Whales, and Wounded Pride: The Trump Doctrine on Aid and Applause
In a recent outburst that sounded suspiciously like a Mad Libs page read through a bullhorn, former President Donald J. Trump launched into a diatribe connecting three unrelated but emotionally charged topics: windmills, whales, and a personal grievance that Gaza never thanked him for humanitarian aid. You know, the classics. At a rally that felt
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Comic‑Con 2025: When Tron, Robots, and Redux Make Us Question Reality
San Diego Comic‑Con 2025 has officially arrived, bringing with it the usual spectacle: bold trailers, unexpected celebrity cameos, and the kind of hyperreal sci‑fi enthusiasm that makes your real life feel like dial‑up internet. Here’s your satirical review of the weirdest, wildest, and most neon-lit highlights: 1. Tron: Ares Takes Over Hall H Disney premiered
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The $8 Billion Paramount Merger That Proves Late-Stage Capitalism Still Dreams in 4K
Well, pop some popcorn and cancel your originality, folks—because the FCC has just approved the $8 billion Paramount–Skydance merger, and the entertainment-industrial complex just grew another head. Somewhere between “Mission: Impossible 37” and the fourth reboot of Cheers, this landmark media marriage means that all your favorite intellectual properties now belong to a single cinematic