Latest posts
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The Battle of the Billionaire Kaiju: Netflix and Paramount Fight to See Who Gets to Kill Cinema
The ink wasn’t even dry on the surrender treaty before a new warlord arrived with a bigger bag of cash and a scarier line of credit. Just when we thought the funeral for the Hollywood studio system was over, just when we had resigned ourselves to a future where Warner Bros. was merely a sub-directory
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How Donald Trump Turned the Kennedy Center Honors into a MAGA Variety Hour
The nation’s premier cultural institution has been rebranded as a Atlantic City lounge act, and the price of admission is your dignity. The John F. Kennedy Center for the Performing Arts was designed as a living memorial to a slain president, a marble temple on the Potomac intended to elevate the American spirit through the
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Citizenship Is Now a Vibe Check: How Operation Midway Blitz Turned Chicago into a Constitutional Dead Zone
The Department of Homeland Security has apparently decided that the Fourteenth Amendment is just a suggestion, and that a Sam’s Club parking lot is the new Ellis Island. If you were under the impression that United States citizenship was a legal status conferred by the Constitution, validated by birth certificates, and protected by the Bill
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The Bulwark Wants to Build a Bigger Ship, But We Are Already Underwater
When the sensible conservatives start sounding like doomsday preppers, it is time to check the expiration date on the canned goods. There is a specific frequency of alarm that only emits from the offices of The Bulwark. It is not the shrill, glass-shattering panic of liberal Twitter, nor is it the guttural, blood-and-soil roar of
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The Ghost of Competence Past: Joe Biden Accepts an Award While the World Burns
In a hotel ballroom in Washington, a decent man tried to remind us that the government wasn’t always a weapon, while the press corps frantically zoomed in to see if he blinked too slowly. On December 5, 2025, the timeline offered us a split-screen moment so jarring it felt like a glitch in the simulation.
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The United States of Paranoia: When the National Security Strategy Reads Like a Reddit Thread
The new official policy of the United States is apparently that France is too dark, Russia is just misunderstood, and the Western Hemisphere is a gated community that needs a higher fence. There is a specific kind of document that usually emerges from the White House every few years called the National Security Strategy. Historically,
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The Supreme Court Is About to Decide if the Constitution Has a “No Vacancy” Sign
The Fourteenth Amendment is clear, unless you are a lawyer paid to pretend that “born in the United States” is a metaphor for “born in a country club with the right membership dues.” We have reached the point in the American experiment where the user agreement is being rewritten in real time, and the terms
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The Battle of Suriname: How We Saved Ohio from a Boat Headed to the Netherlands
The White House promised us they were stopping a direct threat to the homeland, but it turns out they were just interdicting a shipment for the Amsterdam party scene with a Hellfire missile. Geography has never been a strong suit of the American empire. We have a long and storied history of confusing one desert
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The United States of Amnesia: Importing the European Nursing Home Model to Save the Snowflakes
When the goal is to turn a dynamic superpower into a gated community for the frightened, you end up importing the stagnation along with the prejudice. There is a specific kind of architectural madness currently gripping the West Wing, a design flaw in the blueprint of the new American century that would be laughable if
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Olivia Nuzzi’s American Canto: The Art of Selling a Scandal Without Actually Selling the Goods
When the memoir is less a reckoning and more a press release written in the font of a nervous breakdown. The collapse of a reputation in Washington usually follows a predictable physics. There is the initial transgression, followed by the frantic denial, the inevitable leak of digital receipts, the forced resignation, and finally the exile