Look, I’m all for the image of a luxurious bubble bath surrounded by candles, Enya echoing in the background, and rose petals floating like a spa-sponsored hallucination. But if that’s your only vision of self-care? You’re missing out on the real joy. The kind that isn’t photogenic, but feels like taking your bra off after a 14-hour shift.
Self-care isn’t always glamorous. Sometimes, it’s borderline absurd. Sometimes, it’s petty. Sometimes, it’s “turning your phone on Do Not Disturb and watching Survivor reruns until your problems feel as distant as Fiji.” But make no mistake—these little things? They’re saving lives. Or at the very least, keeping me from throat-punching strangers at H-E-B.
Here are my Top 5 unexpected joys of self-care, in all their unfiltered, semi-chaotic glory.
1. The Ruthless Power of an Unfollow
There is nothing quite like the dopamine hit of unfollowing someone who has annoyed you for years. I don’t care if we were lab partners in high school or shared a single shift at Chili’s in 2007—if your posts give me secondhand rage, you’re gone. No explanation. No drama. Just sweet, silent serenity.
Self-care is not exposing your eyeballs to the digital equivalent of nails on a chalkboard. I used to feel guilty. Now? I feel free. And that’s growth.
2. Cleaning That One Corner You’ve Avoided for Six Months
There’s a specific breed of joy that comes from finally attacking the neglected corner of doom in your home. You know the one: it’s been holding an empty Amazon box, a broken umbrella, and three unmatched socks for reasons.
You don’t need to clean the whole house. You just need to tackle that space. Suddenly, you’ve accomplished something. You’ve conquered chaos. You are a god among mortals with a freshly vacuumed corner.
3. Saying “No” Without a Spreadsheet of Excuses
I used to be the Queen of Justification. Saying “no” meant providing a full PowerPoint of reasons, complete with timelines, pie charts, and a closing summary of my regrets.
Now? I say “no” with a smile and no follow-up. And let me tell you—it feels like taking off a tight bra. It’s liberating, it’s mature, and it’s a reminder that boundaries aren’t rude—they’re necessary.
Bonus points if you practice in the mirror like a dramatic soap opera character: “No. I simply… won’t.”
4. Eating a Full Meal Sitting Down (Like a Person, Not a Seagull)
I don’t mean a sad desk lunch or eating string cheese over the sink while scrolling through doom tweets. I mean plating the food, sitting down, and chewing like someone who didn’t just survive a 12-hour hospitality shift by snorting espresso and spite.
It doesn’t have to be fancy. It just has to be yours. You deserve to eat like you matter—because you do.
5. Sharing a Show You Love With Someone New
There’s something magical about sitting next to someone you adore (hi, Matthew) while watching a show that once carried you through a rough patch. Seeing them laugh at your favorite moment or cry during the finale? It’s healing.
Self-care isn’t always solo. Sometimes, it’s in the connection. The shared joy. The knowing look when a character does the thing. And sometimes it’s in the gentle teasing when they don’t like it but pretend to because they love you anyway.
That’s self-care in disguise: the soft power of saying, “This mattered to me. I want it to matter to you too.”
So no, my self-care doesn’t look like Pinterest says it should. It’s not eucalyptus steam and silk robes and $80 candles. It’s petty clicks, small victories, boundary flexes, and shared popcorn on the couch.
And it works. Because real self-care isn’t about aesthetics—it’s about restoration.
Whatever your version looks like, I hope you give yourself permission to lean into it. Even if it’s just deleting another unread email and calling it emotional spring cleaning.