Latest posts
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The Battle of the Billionaire Kaiju: Netflix and Paramount Fight to See Who Gets to Kill Cinema
The ink wasn’t even dry on the surrender treaty before a new warlord arrived with a bigger bag of cash and a scarier line of credit. Just when we thought the funeral for the Hollywood studio system was over, just when we had resigned ourselves to a future where Warner Bros. was merely a sub-directory
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The Supreme Court is About to Turn the Constitution into a Customer Service Complaint Line That Goes Straight to Voicemail
If you have ever looked at the federal government and thought, “You know what this place needs? More impulsivity and less adult supervision,” then boy, does the Supreme Court have a treat for you. The high court is currently preparing to hand Donald Trump the keys to the regulatory state, effectively allowing him to treat
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Jasmine Crockett for Senate: The Only Socialist in Texas is the Guy Writing Checks to Elon Musk
They are going to call Jasmine Crockett a socialist.1 Of course they are. In the modern Republican lexicon, “socialist” is just a synonym for “person I am afraid of,” and right now, there is nobody the Texas GOP fears more than the Congresswoman from Dallas who treats a committee hearing like a cross-examination and a
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How Donald Trump Turned the Kennedy Center Honors into a MAGA Variety Hour
The nation’s premier cultural institution has been rebranded as a Atlantic City lounge act, and the price of admission is your dignity. The John F. Kennedy Center for the Performing Arts was designed as a living memorial to a slain president, a marble temple on the Potomac intended to elevate the American spirit through the
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Trump’s $12 Billion Apology Note to Farmers Is Signed With Your Credit Card
The arsonist has returned to the scene of the crime, not to put out the fire, but to sell the victims a very expensive glass of water. On Monday, the political circus will descend upon Washington with the heavy, frantic energy of a infomercial host realizing his product is defective. President Trump, flanked by a
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Trump Tries To Buy a Congressman, But the Congressman Is A Better Con Man
The President thought he was purchasing a party switch with a pardon, but he forgot that in Texas, you take the cattle and leave the cowboy holding the rope. There is a specific, grimy elegance to the way Donald Trump approaches the presidency. He does not view it as a constitutional office or a sacred
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Citizenship Is Now a Vibe Check: How Operation Midway Blitz Turned Chicago into a Constitutional Dead Zone
The Department of Homeland Security has apparently decided that the Fourteenth Amendment is just a suggestion, and that a Sam’s Club parking lot is the new Ellis Island. If you were under the impression that United States citizenship was a legal status conferred by the Constitution, validated by birth certificates, and protected by the Bill
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The Law of the Sea (According to the Guy Who Threw the Axe on Fox & Friends)
When the Department of Defense decides that “interdiction” is just a fancy word for “snuff film.” The United States Navy has a long and storied tradition of rescuing sailors in distress. It is one of those ancient maritime codes, like not whistling on the bridge or avoiding bananas on a boat, that separates professional mariners
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The Divorce of the Century: Marjorie Taylor Greene Leaves the Cult
When the most loyal soldier in the MAGA army decides to go AWOL, it isn’t a political pivot; it is a primal scream from inside the house. The marriage between Donald Trump and Marjorie Taylor Greene was never going to end with a quiet mediation and a shared custody agreement for the base. It was
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The Bulwark Wants to Build a Bigger Ship, But We Are Already Underwater
When the sensible conservatives start sounding like doomsday preppers, it is time to check the expiration date on the canned goods. There is a specific frequency of alarm that only emits from the offices of The Bulwark. It is not the shrill, glass-shattering panic of liberal Twitter, nor is it the guttural, blood-and-soil roar of