Latest posts
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The Bartender Who Bought the Bar: Why AOC’s Senate Run Is the Chaos We Deserve
It has been seven years since a twenty-eight-year-old bartender from the Bronx looked at the decaying edifice of the Queens Democratic machine, ordered a seltzer, and then proceeded to bulldoze the entire building. We all remember the shock of 2018. We remember the “AOC phenomenon,” a phrase used by consultants to describe something they hoped
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The Ring Is in the Dishwasher, but the Marriage Is in the Sewer: Why Usha Vance Might Finally Be Tired of the MAGA Casting Call
There is a specific genre of political theater that plays out in the unspoken spaces of a marriage, a silent drama usually reserved for the frantic final act of a melodramatic screenplay. But recently, that drama has spilled out onto the campaign trail and into the glossy pages of People magazine, centering on the ring
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No Good Deed and the Critics: Why ‘Wicked’ Is the Tragedy We Deserve
The lights went down in the theater, and for a brief moment, the collective anxiety of the world—the elections, the economy, the general sense that we are living in the final season of a poorly written reality show—suspended itself in the dark. I sat there with Matthew, my fiance and designated emotional anchor, and our
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The Bat-Signal for Partisan Hacks: Texas Begs Alito to Save the Gerrymander
The frantic energy currently radiating from the Texas Governor’s Mansion is not the result of a grid emergency or a sudden concern for the welfare of the state’s foster children. It is the specific, high-pitched frequency of political desperation. On November 20, the state’s leadership, spearheaded by Governor Greg Abbott and Attorney General Ken Paxton,
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The Great Digital Vanishing: Watching a Trillion Dollars Evaporate in Real Time
There is a specific, heavy silence that settles over the internet when the gambling stops being fun and starts being mathematical. You can feel it in the sudden drop in laser-eye profile pictures on social media. You can hear it in the absence of “Have Fun Staying Poor” tweets. It is the sound of a
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The Black Box Breaks Open: Why OpenAI Can No longer Hide Behind the Magic Trick
For the last two years, OpenAI has not really been a technology company. It has been a theology. It operated on the collective faith that if we just fed enough money and electricity into the black box, a digital god would emerge to solve cancer, climate change, and the burden of writing email subject lines.
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The Nuclear Football is in the Hands of a Man Who Just Called a Reporter “Piggy”
If you want to know the exact moment the American presidency dissolved from a functioning executive branch into a chemically unstable mood ring, you don’t need to look at the nuclear codes or the classified briefings. You just need to look at Truth Social at 3:00 AM, where the Commander-in-Chief is currently debating whether it
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The Art of the Deal (With a Socialist): Why Donald Trump Just Adopted a “Communist Lunatic” on Live TV
The simulation didn’t just glitch on November 21, 2025; it blue-screened, rebooted, and loaded a corrupted file from a different timeline. In the Oval Office, beneath the stern, oil-painted gaze of George Washington, the President of the United States sat next to the Mayor-elect of New York City. On paper, this should have been a
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The Broken Clock Finally Strikes Twelve: A Eulogy for the Marjorie Taylor Greene Era
It is a rare and disorienting experience to watch a arsonist suddenly grab a fire hose, but here we are. On November 21, 2025, Representative Marjorie Taylor Greene—the woman who turned performative cruelty into a legislative brand strategy—announced her resignation from Congress. In a four-page statement and video that will likely be studied by future
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The Privacy of Arsonists: Why Congressional Seditionists Are Suddenly Worried About Their Data Plans
The modern American Senator is a creature of profound, almost biological delicacy. They are capable of summoning a mob to the steps of the Capitol, feeding that mob a steady diet of existential dread and lies, and then, when the glass breaks and the tear gas clears, they are capable of weeping softly because someone